꧁꧂
"𝙄'𝙢 𝙨𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮," he says into my hair, "𝙄'𝙢 𝙨𝙤 𝙨𝙤 𝙨𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮." The sound of his voice breaking causes the tears to finally fall.
"You came back," I sigh into his chest. He pulls away, holding my face in his hands, and my heart flutters...
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| Lily |
I pray for the day I no longer have to take my medicine. For the day I can live normally, without routine doctor's visits. When the looks of pity from the few people I see daily, vanish. When I can make my own decisions, about my own life. If it's even mine anymore. But for now, I take it one step at a time. Agonizing steps with feet filled with cement. Slowly getting better, taking baby steps towards normality, first I've just got to get used to it. Normality that is.
After many arguments with my parents, they've agreed to let me return to school. It took weeks of convincing. Weeks. My mother was the most reluctant to let me go. I guess she just cares too much. She wants me to stay, I can tell that she still detests the idea, but I could care less. Nonetheless, she's willing to let me live a somewhat normal teenage life, even if it's only a little bit.
Today, however, to in a way Cristen me back into the society of our quiet town of Avonlea we'll be attending a church picnic, a rather boring affair. Just one of the many baby steps. Despite this, I was quite thrilled, although a hint of fear is ever-present in my thoughts. Avonlea is a small town, and rumors will spread about my reappearance the second I arrive at that picnic.
My mother dresses me in white, as she usually does. White, like the ghost I am. I've just turned fifteen last month, though she still feels the need to choose what I dress in. The very sight of myself makes my heart sink in self-pity. I'm certainly not the picture of perfect health, but I still look a bit alive. My mother returns and stands behind me, I turn to face her.
"You do know how beautiful you are, right Lily?" She cups my face in her hands. Flinching due to their coldness I force a smile at her, she sighs, "I wish you could just stay with your father and me." My smile fades, I decide its time for me to leave irritated by my mother's constant begging. I can feel her eyes on me as I make my way downstairs.
"Forever," she finishes under her breath.
ꕥ
I guess I forgot how beautiful Avonlea was. I can't keep my eyes from wandering, gazing into the lush around us. When we arrive, however, my eyes almost immediately dart down, fearful to catch the judgmental gaze of one of the townspeople. As a family, we make our way to a tent where I'm surprised to see Diana Barry and her family sitting and enjoying treats. Excitement enthralls me upon seeing my old friend.
"Diana!" I call out to her and run over. She turns my way and jumps from her seat and envelopes me in a hug. She squeezes me as if trying to close the gap between us that has been the last five years. We proceed to bombard each other with questions. I could care less at that moment about the threads of gossip overlapping around us.
"So, you are coming back to school, right?" she questions with wide eyes, I simply nodded, "when, please let it be soon."
"In only two days." I laugh at her eagerness.
"Well why not tomorrow, that's when we officially start?" I tense up slightly at the question, my gaze suddenly becoming downcast. Time to explain.
"The only day the doctor is free to clear me to return is tomorrow, until I'm cleared, I'll just have to wait." I can feel her hand on my shoulder and return my eyes to hers where she offers me a sympathetic smile. I hate this part.
"Well to me you look perfectly healthy, I'm sure you'll have no trouble—"
"That doesn't change the fact that there's still something wrong with me." I cut her off, letting the silence sting the air.
One second
Two seconds
Three sec—
"You're still going to love school though," she perked up, "the lessons may be ever so boring, but you'll get to meet the rest of the girls. Oh, and you'll meet Anne! She's lovely. And Gilbert Blythe is returning. I don't know if you remember him but—" she rambles on as I nod every few seconds, pretending to listen. My thoughts drift elsewhere. I knew more awkward pauses were to come, people unsure of how to act around someone who is ill. I may have taken one step towards normality, but I still had a long way to go. I was brought out of my daze by a glimpse of a fiery orange braid of hair whipping in the distance.
"Who's that running?" I interrupt Diana. She quickly averts her gaze towards the runaway redhead.
"Oh that's Anne," she replies, "I was just telling you how the Cuthberts recently adopted her, she was an orphan. You'll meet her when you come to school."
"I wonder why she's running away" I spoke under my breath.
"Yeah," she sighed, "me too."
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ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ's ɴᴏᴛᴇ
hope you guys liked the first chapter. it's kind of the introductory chapter to Lily and her life in Avonlea so sorry if it's a bit boring. I promise it will get more interesting next chapter when Gilbert is introduced!
anyway, vote and comment, it is greatly appreciated!