Who are you actually?

The Almost End

Luke and I walked into Jacob's house, hand in hand. We exchanged looks before coming into the living room. Shawn and Nash were playing cards and drinking two Coca Cola's. 

"Hey," Nash said, not even looking up from his cards. 

Shawn's face changed when he saw us.

"Luke, let go of my girlfriend's hand," he said faux nonchalantly. 

Luke normally would have retorted something back, but he remained silent. 

"Shawn, we need to talk," I whispered, looking down at my feet. 

He looked from me to Luke. His body was like a jumbled puzzle. His eyes showed hurt; his fists showed anger. We walked into Jacob's room and shut the door. 

"What's going on?" he asked calmly.

"I can't do this anymore, Shawn."

"Do what?"

"Be with you. I'm not losing my family."

He looked at the door and screamed, "Bullshit, Aria. If you cared about your family, you wouldn't have left Canada. You just want to be with whoever the shiny new toy is! It was like that with Cameron and it's like that with Luke!"

"That's not true!"

"Yes it is and you know it! I'm honestly surprised you never went for Nash! Well, you did have those dreams about him!"

"Shawn stop!" I screamed, tears flowing down my face.

"You're such a little whore, Aria! Stay away from me and my friends. If you want to be with Luke so badly, then do it. See if I care. Get out."

"This isn't your house, Shawn. It's Jacob's."

"You're right. I'm so out of here," he said, storming out of the room. 

I fell to the ground, broken in a million pieces. I had never felt a pain like this before. It was Earth shattering. Completely horrible. I wailed in my hands and brought my head to my knees. 

"I'm not going to leave you, Aria," a voice said by the door.

I looked up to find Nash standing with his hand on the knob, looking at his feet. 

I sniffled and said, "you need to go with Shawn, Nash. You need to leave me to my own destruction."

"If you know your exploding, why don't you stop?"

"Because I deserve this."

"Nobody deserves this," he said, putting an arm around me. "By the way, you're not a whore. Shawn doesn't think you are either. He's just being an asshole right now."

"I get it. Thanks."

I hugged him and left the room, wiping my tears. Shawn and Luke were gone.

Contrary to popular belief, Luke and I aren't together. He didn't want to be with me. So... yeah I'm really alone right now. I can't go back to Canada. I can't stay here. I can't kill myself (not that that was an option but just saying). 

What to do... What to do...