Sometimes, I feel like the one I'm praying to someone who doesn't believe in me. That I'm in the bottom of the trash bin he threw me into, because he can't believe he created me.
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Sometimes, all I can hear is my heart. It doesn't speak to me anymore. It just whispers - pleads - for me to let the love in, to let in the light. It synchronizes perfectly with the beating. So perfectly, that I tend to not hear the whispers - the beating of my heart is too loud.
All I hear is my mind.
Not sometimes.
All the time.
Constantly.
It's annoying and incessant, but it keeps my heart warm. Warm with the rage and the resentment and the hate. My mind says that it is keeping my heart safe. That it is the only one I have on my side. Tells me there can't be anymore hurt - won't be anymore hurt - if I just listen to it.
I can't get my hopes up if I'm hopeless.
I can't get hurt if all I feel is pain.
Can't have my trust broken if I don't trust anyone in the first place.
Can't become cold-hearted if I'm already frozen.
I can't be burned if I'm already a raging fire.
YOU ARE READING
The Swallows and the Sunsets
PoetryI tend to find meanings in things not intended to have one.
