Naruto One-shots

A Very Cliché Day

Summary: Because fanfiction usually isn't a proper representation of canon. Some of the Naruto characters are bitter (and the others are outraged). One-shot, crack-fic, mock-fic!

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Naruto sat quietly in the classroom. Today was graduation day and many of his fellow students stared at him.

His usual orange jumpsuit was gone, replaced by what can only be described as "sensible shinobi attire."

"Hey, dobe!" Kiba yelled. "Despite the fact that I never say a word to you until the Chunin Exams, I'm compelled to ask why your attire has changed!"

"You're talking too smart, Kiba," Shikamaru yawned while handing him the script. "Remember, this is the one where you're brash and stupid and basically Naruto before the author had their wish fulfillment."

Kiba scrunched his nose and flipped through the script. "Oh yeah. Okay, redo!"

Everyone sighed and went back to their original places.

"Dobe!" Kiba yelled. "What the hell are you wearing?!"

Shikamaru nodded. "That's better."

Naruto snorted and fixed him with an unimpressed look. "Since you're obviously too stupid to tell, Inuzuka, I'll spell it out for you: it was all an act. A mask, of sorts, I suppose."

Kiba opened his mouth, then frowned. "Wait, wait, so you spent six years making everyone think that you're dumb? Why?"

Naruto sneered. "Obviously so that no one would perceive me as a threat and try to exterminate me."

"...why did you stop now? Wouldn't it have worked better if you just kept acting like an idiot?"

Naruto facepalmed. "Kiba, you're not supposed to ask questions! You're supposed to be awed and intimidated by me! Now we gotta start all over aga-"

"I WIN!" two voiced yelled.

Ino Yamanaka and Sakura Haruno ran into the classroom. They paused when they noticed everyone staring at them.

"Were we early?" Ino asked.

"Yeah, there were three more minutes left in the scene," Chouji said.

"No, wait!" Sakura was looking at her timer. "No, we're on time! It's you guys that are behind!"

Sasuke, who was sitting in the corner of the room, sighed. "Look, we already screwed it up, so we might as well start ov-"

"Congratulations on graduati- Wait, did the scene not start yet?"

Everyone slumped when they saw Iruka's sheepish face.

SSSRHA scowled. "Okay, new plan!"

-

Naruto ran desperately away from the Villagers.

Why me? he thought. What have I ever done? What did-

"Naruto!"

Naruto tripped and fell. He looked up. "Old Man, you're not supposed to come until after the Villagers beat me to near-death!"

The Hokage blinked. "But where's the logic in that? I know you're being attacked, so why don't I stop it?"

"Some plot twist will hopefully be revealed later!" Naruto snapped. "Or maybe the author will just leave it alone! Did you even read the script?!"