to him ••• yoonmin

Califronia Dreamin

Jimin-
Joshua kisses up my neck. I try to push him away. "Josh, you aren't even listening," I whine.
"Yes I am baby," he says. He continues kissing. "You're friends are jerks and you feel bad."
"That's not all of it," I say. I attempt to climb off my lap but he stills me. "Joshua. I don't want to do this. I'm really upset."
He sighs. "Jimin, just let me take your stress away. Just put your hands on my hair and let me take care of you."
"I don't want to have sex right now," I say.
He pushes me off his lap and pins me down to the bed. "Jimin, we can do this the easy way or the hard way," he growls.
I stay down. I know better than to fight with him. And even though I really don't want to, he's going to fuck me. "Joshua, I don't want to."
"Then shut up and wait until it's over," Joshua says.
•••
I lay on his bed aimlessly. My body aches. He didn't prep me at all. I didn't want to. Now I just have cum inside of me and tears on my face. Joshua already left to take a shower. But the shower has already tuned off, and he comes back into the room.
"Hey baby. You felt so nice," he says. He kisses my cheek.
"I said no," I say. "No means no."
Joshua sighs. "I'm your boyfriend. I have the power. You don't get to say no to me."
I sit up. "I'm going to go take a shower." I walk away. I get into the shower and start scrubbing all the dried cum off my thighs. I wash my hair and scrub my body. I stare at my wrist a little longer than I should.
I wrap a towel around my waist and go back to his room. Joshua is dressed. He's holding his phone. "Hey pretty boy. I have some nice photos of you," he says.
My heart drops. "W-what?" My throats dry. "Joshua, delete those."
He shakes his head. "Jiminie, I like them. You look so pretty in them. You're messy beneath me."
I get dressed quickly. I grab my phone and my charger. "I'll text you later," I say. I get my shoes on and leave without another word. It's a short walk from his side of town to mine. But it's getting colder. December is just around the corner.
After ten minutes, I'm finally to my street. I see Yoongi's car parked outside of Taehyung's house. I know they're all mad at me. I need to apologize. I need someone to help. I love Joshua so much. But I can't make decisions when with him. I know I can't call it tape since he's my boyfriend.
Before I even get to the door, it's opened. Taehyung is standing in the doorway. "What did he do?" He asks.
I start crying. I take a few more steps to be able to bury my head into his shoulder. "I'm sorry."
Taehyung kisses my ear. "You're okay, Jiminie. Lets go inside before your tears freeze." He pushes me inside. We go up to his room. Hoseok and Yoongi are on their phones. They both look up at us when the door closes.
Yoongi sits up. "What happened?" He reaches out for me.
He holds my hand. "It's not a big deal," I say. "It's a mix of things."
He brushes my tears. "Tell us, Jiminie."
I let out a shaky breath. "I was trying to talk to him about the issue between us. It's been bothering me and I needed to let it out. But he kept kissing me and wouldn't listen. He ended up just shoving me on the bed and we had sex. He said that he's in change and stuff and I don't get to tell him what to do. After I took a shower, he said he took pictures. He doesn't want to delete them so I just left."
They're all quiet. Taehyung and Yoongi looks furious. Hoseok looks stunned. "So," Hoseok starts, "he raped you?"
I shake my head. "No, he didn't. He's my boyfriend. This happened a lot last time we were dating."
"So he's raped you multiple times?" Yoongi asks. "You can be raped by your boyfriend. If you said no, it's rape."
I shake my head. "It's not like that! I want comfort right now and you are just making me mad. Do you want me to leave?"
"No," Taehyung says quickly. "I want you to stay. I want you to spend the night."
I frown. "Why?"
"Why what? You're my best friend. Why can't I just want you to stay," Tae says.
I shrug. "Fine."
It's quiet for a moment. "So, he took pictures?" Hoseok asks. I nod. "Without your permission?" I nod again.
Hoseok sighs. "Jimin, I don't know if you know this, but that's child pornography. He could show people those photos of you. If he was caught having those, you could be denied to go to Juilliard."
I frown. I know he's right. And Joshua is the type to show people. My god, he'll send them around. It'll get to my school and everyone will see all of me. I wrap my arms around Taehyung's waist. "Everyone's going to see them," I cry. "I'm such a whore."
"Jimin, no," Taehyung says. He kisses my head and rubs my back. "I won't get them. I'll go talk to Joshua. I can go right now."
I left my head. "What if it's too late?"
"Then I will track down every person he sends it to and threaten them," he says. He detaches himself frown me. "Hoseok come on. I need to get Jin and Namjoon too."
"What are you going to do?" I ask.
"I'm going to make sure he won't send them. I will not let you down." He kisses my cheek. "If he sends them, you are breaking up with him. No matter what."
I nod. The couple leaves. Yoongi stares at me. "Are you okay? Did he hurt you?"
"No, I'm okay," I say. "Do you think he'll share the photos?"
Yoongi bites his lip. "I hope not. No one should be allowed to see your body. They don't deserve to."
I look at him. His eyes are sad. I move closer to him. "Yoongi I'm sorry."
"It's fine."
"It's not. It was really shitty of me to do that," I say.
"It was. Not gonna argue. But honestly, I don't know what I expected," Yoongi says. "I know you like Joshua too much to care for your own well being." His voice is low. It makes me feel weak. I don't want him to be mad at me.
I take a breath and get up. I sit on his lap, a leg on either side of him. "I'm sorry. I don't want to make you hurt."
He stares up at me. His tongue dampens his lips. "Jimin, What are you doing?" He asks.
"I want to give you your chance."
He's quiet. His hands rest on Tae's bed. He doesn't move to hold me. I don't know what he's thinking, but I need to so badly. He just stares at me. I lean down and less my lips into his lips. I don't move. I can feel his breath on me. My arms go up to his shoulders. I kiss him again.
"Jimin," He says. "Don't do this. You're making it harder."
"How?"
"You're not mine. I won't touch another man's boyfriend," Yoongi says. "I won't touch you until you break up with him."
I sigh. I get off his lap. "You're too good. You deserve someone as good as you."
"I don't want someone like me. I want you. But I can't until you say you will break up with Joshua."
I look at him. "I can't."
Yoongi sighs. "Okay. That's that." He sits up. "Lets get you home."
I stand up and follow him. "I thought I was spending the night here," I say.
Yoongi shakes his head. "No, we are having a sleep over at your house. Taehyung is busy tonight."
We leave the house and walk across the street to mine. My mom is home so I tell her Yoongi is staying over. Hopefully my parents decide to be good and not fight tonight.
We up to my room. Yoongi compliments my cleanliness. I give him some sweat pants to wear. It's so awkward. I wish he'd just let me in. I want him. But I can't leave Joshua. I put on a movie. He lets me lay my head on his shoulder.
•••
Loud yelling makes my jolt up. Yoongi also wakes up. He looks at me with panic. I sigh and lay back down. "It's my parents."
"Why are they yelling like that?" He asks.
I shrug. "Because ty don't love each other anymore."
"Why don't they get a divorce?"
"They don't want to affect me. That's one reason I want to leave. My parents can split and finally be happy," I say. "It sucks and I want them to break up. Instead they yell and scream at each other until they can't anymore."
"That's horrible."
"Mhm." I bite my lip. "Why do you live with Jungkook and your aunt. Where's your parents?" I ask.
He stares at nothing for a while. "My parents were young. My mom was sixteen and my dad was just a few months ahead. They had me and they couldn't take care of me. My aunt is four years older than my mom. She took care of me and eventually I just lived with her permanently. I probably would've went to live with my parents when they finished college. But my mom found out she had breast cancer. She didn't live very long after that. And my dad loved her so much that he couldn't go on without her. So, they're both dead, leaving me an orphan."
I look at his face there isn't very much sorrow. I hug him. "I'm sorry, Yoongi."
He sighs. "It's okay. I was only four so I couldn't really know what was happening. Everyone was crying, but I didn't know why. We had their funerals together and they are Burris's next to each other."
I sit on his thighs. "I'd like to visit them. I want to thank them for bringing you into this world despite how young they were."
He smiles at me. "We can. Hopefully your parents' fight will blow over."
I look out the window. It's pitch black. "Let's go. We'll need coats and blankets though."