Staying In Love With Zak Bagans , The Sequel To Falling In Love With Zak Bagans

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The baby is asleep and its early evening "What do you want to talk about, ? " he asks leaning against the doorway in the kitchen, hands in pockets, i am standing by the sink facing him,  "Us"  he looks puzzled, "What about us we are fine"  i shake my head  "Really you think we are fine, "  he takes his hands out of his pockets  "Well yeah work is busy, baby is fine we are fine, life is good"  "Zak we don't spend any time together, if your not working your out with the guys,"   he looks at his phone,  "I'm home most nights"  "Yes but we don't have time for us , i miss you, "  he smiles  "I'm not going anywhere am i "  i move nearer to him and put my arms around him, he kisses me on the lips, then he moves away,  "Zak, "   "I'm tired i have had a long day, i just want an early night, ok "  and he walks out of the kitchen, and i am frustrated, and also returning to work next week, 

First few days at work are crazy but i enjoy feeling human again and yes i miss the baby, but Zak has a week off work which helps and i am going out with friends tonight first time in ages 

Im nearly walking out the door, zak is holding a crying baby and looks tired I kiss my boys, 

When i get to the wine bar a couple of friends have cancelled so its just me and this guy  Matt, he is my age and is dark haired and good looking, we have the same sense of humour, we talk over a couple of glasses of wine,  "How is married life ? "  "Its nice i say taking a sip of wine, "  "And the baby ? "  my eyes lite up talking about him  " Beautiful yes its great, "  "I never thought i would see the day zak would settle down, Matt says with all seriousness my smile fades and Matt notices i don't want to cry, "Whats wrong has something happened ? "  "No not really, i just feel like he is a bit distant"  "You did say he has been working alot"  Matt takes my hand and holds it in his hand  "Are you happy "  "Yes of course its what i wanted "   I remove my hand from his  "I have to go "  i put my glass down and leave

I have been home 20 minutes I keep thinking about Matt's words  " Are you happy ? "  even though zak is next to me in bed i feel a distance growing between us  am i really happy,

Zak's phone beeps with a message, he is asleep and I'm wondering who is texting my husband at this time in the morning now I'm paranoid is he cheating on me, the time glows red on the alarm clock,  Its 3:11 am,   i have to trust him he is my husband and I'm not going to check his phone, 

Curiosity, gets the better of me and i take his phone downstairs and open the message it reads  "Hi i couldn't sleep wondered if you were awake so we could talk x "  there is no name in the phone just a number,  i close his phone, my mind racing what is going on with him is he not happy, with me, i go back to bed put his phone back, and try to sleep the time is still only 3:27  still early, 

Its lunchtime at work and Matt approaches her  "Listen if i upset you yesterday im sorry its just you deserve to be happy and he has been a player in the past, "  " Its OK "  She tells him about last night she could use a friend right now  Matt Smiles  "If you were mine i would treat you right, " he walks out of the office,  

I'm so mad at zak , im holding our son and i have to ask him about that message i need to know,  "Are you seeing someone else "  he looks at me "What why would you even say something like that, ? " "I  read your messages zak i know what i saw "  "What the hell why ? "  "Who would phone you in the middle of the night " he is upset "You don't trust me "  "What the hell am i supposed to think ? so come on who is she , what is going on, "  "You think im having an affair ? "   "  We haven't slept together in weeks, your distant to me, we don't talk , your always on your phone just tell me the truth, "  he looks at me for a long time and takes the baby out of my arms,  "Ok you want the truth i will tell you the truth,"