words put together

a sad very sad so very sad song

i produced a painful serenade
and locked it in a hand grenade
and threw it as far as my hand could make
and it blew up and made her fade away
and i think about it every day
and i cry and scream and always say
that if i could do it again, i'd definitely wait
and find the moment she happily lays
and i'd kiss her forehead and start to pray
that the process i start again can only make
her love times ten and-

FUCK

i hate how she peacefully lays
and i have to stay
and she goes away
and i cry and cry
and i fade away
and

FUCK

i hate how i kept the grenade
but i still pulled the pin
but i kept it all in
and

FUCK

i hate the silence i'm left with.

and all i can hear is the mosquito by my blanket.

i haven't showered in days
and my toothbrush is dry
because the sadness in my veins
only gives me time to cry.
and the house is fucking dirty
because i would clean it with her,
singing songs and being flirty
even though i already won her,
she was already my baby,
but i'd flirt like it was our first date
every day,
every day,
and i'd make her smile and laugh
and i'd hug her and

FUCK

i can't believe i made this mistake.