Explicit [GirlxGirl - Complete]

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

It takes me a few seconds for my heart to settle and to regain the courage to head downstairs. I at least know it will be a while until Lianna comes down. Maybe I'll be lucky and I won't have to see her for the rest of the morning.

I enter the kitchen as Mom comes around the corner. She opens the fridge and pulls out the gallon of milk.

"Hey, good morning," she says and leans over to kiss me. I stand stock still as her lips press against my cheek. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine," I say. She gives me a look I pretend not to see.

I walk around the counter and pull a bagel from the bag. I pop the slices into the toaster and rest back against the edge of the island. My bag feels like it's carrying a ton. I thought I'd gotten a good nights sleep. After running into Lianna, it's as if I hadn't slept at all.

Mom pours herself a cup of coffee, being extra generous with the milk. She sets the milk down and grabs the sugar. As she empties two spoonfuls in, she looks up.

"Lianna is nice."

It's actually hard not to let out a snort. I turn my back to her. I let myself roll my eyes without the fear of the consequences.

"Really?" I look around at the almost bare kitchen counter. I need something to do. Something that will make her go away.

I pick the first clean cup I see in the cabinet and a package of cherry blossom tea. It smells horrible. I'll regret it later once I can't do anything about it.

Mom is stirring her coffee, wearing the same look as before. I hate when she gets that look. It's like she can tell I'm lying to her face, but she's not even close to guessing what it is. She can see I'm tired, that I'm fading away, but she doesn't get half of the things swarming me.

I also hate how I sound. It's typical. Like it's almost unbelievable how much I sound like a broken tape spitting words from an old classic movie.

The depressed teen part got old the moment it was a thing.

I toss the tea bag into the cold water. I shove the cup into the microwave. My eyes go cross as I watch the mug turn round and round.

"Maya..." She's behind me. I flinch as she touches my shoulder.

I'm cold when she's around. I can't tell if I'm numb or if I've lost all sense of feeling. But I know I can still feel. I know because when Lianna is around, my blood boils and my chest wants to explode.

"You'd tell me, wouldn't you?"

I don't answer quick enough. I should say yes now and let her forget. But my throat hurts. Tears are burning at the back of my eyes and I don't know what to do.

I look down at my hands. The bagel pops up in the toaster.

When our eyes meet, I know I've fucked up. She's getting closer to the edge, getting closer to her endpoint. She's going to do something about all this. Maybe she'll make me go see a counselor. Maybe she'll give me a talk or make me socialize in a group. I don't know exactly what she's going to do, but I know it's nothing I want to be a part of.

I have to get out of here. That's all I can do to make this better.

I give her a chaste kiss on the cheek. "I said I'm good, Mom. Believe me, okay?"

I pull the biggest smile I can muster. My stomach churns from trying too hard.

The look in her eyes tells me she's got something she wants to say. I know she's holding it back, fighting to keep it hidden until she can unleash it in private when I'm not around. It's like I'm looking in a mirror. Now I know where I've gotten this fear from. But when it was passed to me, it went haywire. No longer can it function properly. It can't be contained.