I'm holding on - Noel Gallagher

Chapter 12

The soundcheck had gone great, they sounded epic and I was so excited to hear blossoms live. Tom was glued to me for the entire night and we'd talked through soundcheck but now it was over and we were waiting in the dressing room, just sat talking about anything and everything.

I'd avoided Noel all night since he'd apparently stayed in his dressing room after the fight. I was supposed to be going back with Naï but I didn't want to see him so I told her to go without me while I stayed with Tom.

"We better be off in a bit we're on supporting soon." All the boys nodded in agreement with tom.

"We'll be out in a bit I just need to talk to Addy for a sec, alright lads?"

"Sure see you in a bit then Tom!" Charlie shouted as the door slammed leaving the two of us alone.

"Right I need y'to stand front and centre in the crowd and make sure you stay the whole gig, I've got a surprise for ya!" He smiled excitedly but I was just left confused.

"If we're gonna be hanging round each other more often, y'should know I hate surprises." I had to be honest I was kinda scared for my surprise.

"Don't worry, you'll love this one Ads, I promise!" And with that he swept round the corner leaving me with an idiotic grin on my face.

I'd started to really like Tom. Like really really. I felt guilty for even thinking about it but I guess now me and Noel aren't together anymore, well I think, then it'd be nice to have someone to tell my problems to. I knew I had Naï but I'd get too shifty talking about this mystery guy who's married and is like 3x my age. I just needed to forget about it and tom knew how to take my mind off things.

I decided to go out to find my spot after I found Anaïs and we made sure to stand front and centre like tom asked. The crowd was incredible but it was to be expected since the boys were pretty damn famous now, not to mention all of Noel's fans from guys who get piss drunk with shades on trying to relive the 90s to experimental teens that are obsessed with all things oasis. It was part of the whole experience and I loved it.

The boys got set up and went straight into there's a reason why. They played a couple more from their new album and then honey sweet. A definite close second so that was obviously amazing and then it seemed like it was time for my surprise.

"This next one we don't normally play but there's an amazing girl here tonight who needs cheering up." Tom spoke through the mic, leaving everyone cheering.
"This one's for Addy. Here's texia!" Tom searched the crowd until he found me and gave me a cheeky wink. I couldn't stop the huge smile on my face, it was impossible. He remembered, he remembered my favourite song and I couldn't believe I was gonna hear it live. The familiar beat came in and I was in a whole other world.

Black tattered eyes, she's dressed in white

Cold afternoons left in my mind

We walked, I talked it through with you

It's just no use, our love won't bind

Don't be fooled by her lipstick gaze

Veils of cool shelter times she strayed

For days I made it through

It was coming up to the chorus and I was so lost I nearly missed the person peeping out behind stage. Nearly.

There he was staring at me with his usual scowl on his face but there was something behind his eyes. I couldn't tell you what it was for definite, I'd never seen it before but it was enough to keep my eyes on him.

I'm running out of the dark with you

With you, I'm running out of the dark

With you, with you, with you

There we were just looking into each other's eyes. I wanted to stay mad. I needed to just focus on Tom and the boys but I couldn't. Not when he looked at me like that and he knew it.
Noel had this way of making you forget everything bad he'd ever done, I don't know how he did it but he did.

As the song continued we remained the same, like it was just us two and no one else. I was ready to forgive him if that's what he wanted and I don't know how I could be this weak. I was the stubbornest person I knew. It wasn't fair that he could fuck my life up and threaten my relationship with everyone I've ever cared about but there he was. I was losing my mind out there but I couldn't look away until the song finished and Anaïs was tapping my arm while Tom looked at me and smiled. He was so sweet. He'd sung a song for me and I was so wrapped up in Noel that I missed the best part. I couldn't wait until I could thank him.

"Give it a couple days Ads and I think you'll have a new boyfriend. Tom seems awfully smitten!" I hit Naï in the arm as she giggled.

"Come on. You can go say thanks to the boys and we can watch dad from the side of the stage!" And with that she dragged me off backstage.