My Bias Wrecker

s e v e n t e e n

I was walking in the midst of all the beautiful flower in this very big field. Sets of different colors waved through the rhythm of the wind as it helped them dance and make beautiful movements.

It was sunny, and a bit cloudy. A perfect day for a little girl. I was completely immersed and overwhelmed from all of the beauty served right before my eyes. It brought wonderful feeling I never felt before.

A lake sitted not far enough from the beautiful flower field, it was shining with the reflection of the sun, giving birth to another beautiful thing to be seen.

I walked closely to a log who was perfectly lying in the middle of all the flowers, and sat there. I heard the sound of chains being touched. I flinched.

I saw a boy, most likely far from my age. He was sitting on the swing. His raven strands were disturbed by the wind, though he managed to fix his hair with the help of his hands, brushing them.

The boy was sitting in the swing, his back was facing me while he was looking intently at the lake. I jolted as the boy looked over to me.

He seemed unrealistic. Ethereal. He looks like he just stepped out of  a beautiful dream, a face that someone could never imagine, features nobody asked for but seemed as a blessing.

His features looked something like the sculptures of Michael Angelo, paintings of Leonardo, something that was hard to explain.

He looked like someone that was brought by the heavens.

I don't know.

He stopped swinging form the material and walked towards me.

His pale skin were more visible, his dark brown eyes were glued in my direction and  I noticed that his mouth gape from the amusement, I don't know. Must be from someone's appearance. I looked around, but there was no one with me.

Suddenly the beautiful sunlight was dimmed, I shivered. It became cold, replacing the nice temperature earlier. All of a sudden, the dark was crawling upon the boys body right before mine. He reached for me, "Saera—"

I felt my heart sting, as I only had a glimpse to his lovely face, I knew it was him. It hurt me more when I only realize it when he, or we, were abduct by the darkness.

Everything became dark, it was  only a false of seconds, but my heart sinked into the darkness. Little did I know, I was brought into a familiar scene my heart could only remember, it was only the pain, the sorrow, and guilt that was present in my little story; it was only him.

I was sitting next to my friends, I was sweating hard and I felt like my stomach just turned. They were happily talking, but with all the chit- chat that they do, I could only feel the pain inside me, the only thing that exists is what was inside of me.

"Saera, I saw him on TV." I turned my head to the face of my friend next to me. I creased my forehead.

"Yeah, me too. He's joining another competition. He's swimming, "she awed and held her face then blushed "we'll be seeing him topless, Saera!" I cringed from what she said. It only made my stomach hurt so much and I hate it.

Suddenly, a very familiar face showed in the door of the room then in a split second I was again sipped into a black hole.

It was painful, so much painful that I was longing for the merciful gaiety, anything; as if there was something more in this ridiculous pain.

I could see myself crying, through the darkness, through the loneliness my body and mind once felt, then there was a vast of light, again it was me running, the light covered everything until I could see my surroundings, from the hallway, towards the railing, with my favorite face standing in the door, right after I passed to him, his expression turned to a shocked one.

I jumped.

And It was too late to retreat.

As I flew from the ground, I could feel the wind hit my body, then I shuffled and saw his worried face, I reached for him, I held out my hands to reach him.

But I wasn't able to do it.

My feelings, all of them, wanted to reach him so bad, I could feel the burst out thoughts and emotions from inside my body, then I felt my tears flushed through my cheeks.

Then I hit something hard, right before I hit the pool down the ground, my body felt weak from the contact.

It hurts so much.

I could here their voices, familiar and unfamiliar ones, they were all present, I could here all of them, I wish they could here mine.

All of a sudden, it was me and the water, I felt like drowning, I don't know how to swim. I felt adrenaline rushed through my body but it didn't help.

And then I heard someone, a deep and low voice, he reached for me, preventing to make my lungs filled by the water of the pool, he saved me.

His eyes were sharp, his brows we're thick, pitch black hair were brushed up from his forehead, he has pretty big nose, tan complexion, and nice red lips.

His grip in me felt comfortable, it felt safer.
He swam towards the corner and lift my body from the water and pushed me to the ground. Right after he lifted himself, he reached for my side and held me up. He looked tired, we were both panting, but he just seemed to shrug it off.

From my peripheral eye view, I could see him, he looked worried, he was standing in the side not far from me, not far from the pace my counterpart has been doing.

"I could have save you, Saera." It wasn't loud, and it wasn't little of a sound, although I heard it.

I looked from my side and met his eyes, I wanted to reach him, my body and mind wanted to reach for him so bad, but my body felt weak to do so, I myself felt weak to do so.

This was your reality Saera, this has ever been your reality, it was only you who could accept this.

I shut my eyes, and let a shaky breath.

Though I wish it wasn't too late, I couldn't  do anything that it was indeed too late, Yoongi-hyung.