Been Here All Along

11| traumatic

"It's funny how you're the broken one but im the only one needing saving." - Rihanna

"Thank you for this, Jos," Ian said to me when he picked me up at 8am Saturday morning. I didn't exactly realize I was agreeing to an 8am wake up call, but I was happy to find a Starbucks coffee waiting in the cup holder for me.

   I immediately picked up the cup and raised it to my lips, not even caring if it wasn't actually mine.

   "You remembered," I smiled softly. He bought me a mocha, my favorite Starbucks drink.

   "Well, duh," he chuckled. "You would drink it religiously in high school."

   That's a fact; our families would always joke about how I would eventually grow addicted to caffeine if I didn't slow down my consumption rate. It's pretty much the only thing that would get me through exam weeks.

   "Did you get anything?" I took another large gulp of my coffee, needing this caffeine to help me function.

   "Nah, I'd rather be tired during this than wide awake and jittery." I'm not sure I'm fully prepared to help Ian through this all, but I have to. He's done so much for me and people I love; I couldn't imagine not doing this for him and being this person for him.

   "You went all the way to Starbucks for me?" I joked.

   "Always, Josie Elle." Truthfully, we both knew Starbucks was on the way from my place to his, but the gesture itself spoke volume.

Ian Miller is someone I've always been able to rely on, and if I know one thing for fact, it's that that will never change.

"How's Joel's tryout going?" Ian asked after clearing his throat abruptly.

"It's going. He's exhausted though." We haven't talked much since he left, but I completely understand. Football all day is draining. For as much time as he does spend playing football, he still makes enough time in his day to give me a phone call or even a FaceTime.

Joel fully intends on going pro with football and letting that be his life and career for as long as his body physically allows him to, but he did major in computer coding so he has a fall back career or even something to do once he retires from the NFL. He was a great student, too, managing to keep his grades up while being as involved in football as he is.

"How's school for you?" That's one thing Ian and I haven't talked about since he's been home. It may not seem like that big of a deal, but it was to us in high school. Ian was the one who helped me decide what I was going to college for and why. It was a difficult decision for me to choose between nursing and psychology, and he helped me decide.

"You can trust I've considered dropping out at least a thousand times, but it's going good. I'm really glad I chose psychology." I can't even imagine myself in nursing now that I've already taken four of my years for psych.

Ian took one of his hand off the steering wheel and held it out in front of me for a high-five. I chuckled and smacked his hand. I couldn't help but notice the extreme grip he had on the wheel when he took one of his hands off. It was then that it clicked that, every time I've driven with Ian, he's always had two hands on the wheel. After the high five, he immediately returned his hand back to the wheel and loosened up slightly.

It has to have something to do with his time away because the Ian I knew pre-war would literally drive with his knees while eating a donut.

"Well, here we are," Ian sighed, not even trying to mock enthusiasm like his personality normally would. "We'll talk more about your schooling after, okay?" I nodded with a small, reassuring smile.