Freak (Discontinued)

Chapter 13

Lauren took a deep intake of breath, feeling it travel through her airways and supply comfort to her anxious brain. She slowly let her eyes flutter open as she felt the presence of somebody standing behind her silently, standing over her almost protectively as she collected herself. Her hesitant eyes landed on her target who was standing across the courtyard from her, laughing carelessly with his friends why running his slender fingers through his blonde hair.

Lauren's mind surged with memories of those hands running over her waist, holding her close and tickling her pale skin with care. She remembered all those countless nights where Lauren would run her hands through that mess of blonde hair since she knew it was the sure way to calm him down when he got overly worked up. She recalled countless memories with the blonde boy and started getting ancy in her posture, quickly flipping around to face the slighlty taller girl with a glare set in her stone cold brown eyes.

"I don't think I can do this" She whispered, her voice panicked as she inched closer to the girl who's strong facade dropped at the first sign of her best friend's unsteadiness.

"Of course you can, Laur" Normani reassured her, her doe brown eyes turning soft as they gazed down at the nervous Cuban, her shoulders dropping from their tense stance and her feet instinctively taking a step closer to the younger woman.

"No, I really can't. What am I even doing? Jake's always been there for me, through everything, this isn't fair to him at all" Lauren shared her unsure thoughts as tears brimmed her emerald eyes.

"No, Lauren. He wasn't always there for you, I was" Normani told her sternly, but she only earned an unsure look in return so she rolled her eyes before elaborating.

"Where was he when your mother died? Where was he when you when Poco ran away? Where was he during the funeral? Where was he during the countless nights that you cried yourself to sleep?" Normani listed off in a firey tone, like she had been prepared to say these things to Lauren since the day she met the blonde boy- which to be fair, she had.

Lauren opened her mouth in preparation to defend her boyfriend, like she always does, but the words died on the tip of her tongue when Normani interrupted her with a pitiful tone,

"You know where he was Lauren, and I'm sorry I have to say it but you know he was with her, I know you know. Every time he was supposed to be holding you and loving you, he was sleeping with her and loving her" Normani told her, her voice urgent and sorrowful as her soft hands came up to rest on the slighlty shorter girls shoulders.

Lauren adverted her gaze to the ground in an instant, her emerald orbs filling with sadness as she remembered the several times that she had caught her boyfriend in the holds of another woman- it hurt her to think about and maybe that was why she had blocked the memories so forcefully that she had truly convinced herself that they didn't exist. Forgive and forget, she told herself.

She knew Normani was right, she always was for whatever reason. But she still couldn't rid herself of the uncertainties swirling through her mind.

"But- but what if Camila doesn't even like me like I like her and I'm doing this all for nothing? I mean, maybe it wasn't right for me to jump to conclusions so quickly- maybe I shouldn't have even kissed her. What if she doesn't feel the same way and she just told me so because she didn't want to hurt my feelings? Or maybe she was scared that Jake would hurt her if she rejected me, I mean he did bully her after all-" Lauren gasped in realization, her eyes widening to the size of saucers,

"Oh my God, that must be it. She was scared that I would run to Jake and tell him that she hurt my feelings and he would beat her up- which to be fair he would. Ohmygod, I'm such a terrible person, what was I thinking? I can't believe I did this to her, what was I thinki-" Normani's eyes widened as she watched her friend spiral herself into panic, quickly flailing her arms and cutting off the rambling with her own words of reassurance.