Change || Loki.

5.

The next morning, Frigga decided to visit Loki. It was still really early in the morning so, she was aware that Loki still might be asleep.

As she made her way to his chambers, she tried to decide in what words could she possibly speak to Loki to begin with. Of course, she felt tremendous amount of guilt and shame but was not sure how to express her feelings to Loki.

When she entered, she saw not what she had expected. The bed was empty and still untouched, instead she found Loki sitting by the window, his head resting against the glass while he stared into nothing. "Oh, Loki." She reached out to him, startling him again. She pinched her brows together when he looked at her. The green of his eyes seemed to have dimmed down to a colour a little dull filled with tiredness and his face just seemed...... lifeless; she supposed.

"Don't come near me," He said, flatly, not looking into her eyes. "Please" he added to a rather rude sounding sentence. "You didn't sleep?" She asked, avoiding to acknowledge his last statement. He shook his head, his raven locks tumbling down to land on his face. "Why didn't you?" She asked, after a small pause, making sure she kept her voice low, not wanting to startle him again.

He turned and looked at her in the eye and asked, "You knew I did no wrong, why didn't you defend me?" He spoke so as if he perhaps knew the answer, already. Frigga remained quiet.

She had nothing to say. Nothing at all.

What was her reason anyway?

Duty? Sacrifice?

Her heart started beating faster and faster as she grew nervous. She wasn't sure what held her back in the first place but now it didn't seem to matter.

She couldn't look him in the eye and just lie. "Loki I-"

"Just please don't lie to me."

Frigga looked down and thought for a moment. There was no justifiable way—under any circumstance— could she possibly put it in.

She was fully conscious to the fact that the events that took place the day before were undeniably unfair.

"You know it Loki, all Thor has ever wanted is to be your father's heir. He's worked so incredibly hard to be worthy of it, it would be so unfair to just let all that hard work go to waste for one small mistake."

Loki took a moment to soak in what his mother had said. He remained silent for quite a long while.

Frigga would've left in defeat if he hadn't spoken up again.

"But what about me?" He asked, his voice was so soft, she could barely even hear it.

She let out a shaky breath, unsure of what to say.

"I know it wasn't fair on you." She spoke slowly, hesitantly.

"But I'm sure you can do this much of a sacrifice for your elder brother." She smiled at him.

"I know you love him." She placed a hand on his cheek and Loki closed his eyes in the comfort of her warm touch.

"I hope you understand, Loki." She added quickly.

Perhaps, Loki understood he was being taken advantage of. Rather, his love for Thor and respect for his mother was being taken advantage of.

But was Loki really willing to do anything about it?

Of course not!

"Yes, Mother. I understand." Loki said, understandingly.

It came as much of a surprise to Frigga. She had prepared herself for a situation in which she thought Loki would yell or argue. But he did none of those things. It seemed way too mature for his age; it just didn't feel right. And of course, it shouldn't either.

She thought if her son had went far enough to understand her situation, she might as well try to ask for forgiveness. Although, she had not much expectations- it was worth a shot.

"So do you forgive me?" She asked, her voice filled with hope.

Loki thought for a moment while frigga stared at him with glimmering eyes.

What could Loki do when he stared into those hopeful eyes? Say no?

She sure did hurt Loki's feelings but was he in a position to stay angry with her?

Loki modded gently. "Yes, Mother."

Although, it was somewhat unreasonable to forgive her so soon, Loki couldn't hold a grudge against her, not even for a second. He loved her way too much to stay mad at her.

When Frigga left, she felt remorse.
So much so that it was consuming in every imaginable way. It was true, Frigga wouldn't have felt so much regret if Loki had just been angry. If he had yelled or shouted or even if he just hadn't forgiven her. But he did forgive her, and now Frigga just didn't know what to with that forgiveness. It didn't seem to have helped much with the constant feeling ruefulness in her heart.

She needed to do something to erase that guilt. Not having much options, she ordered Thor to apologise to Loki.

But when Thor stood at the doors of Loki's chambers, he just couldn't bring enough courage to walk in and face him.

'It's alright, siblings fight all the time. I can do this.' He thought to himself.

Siblings do fight. But not like this.

Loki being a tiny 12 year old boy was not nearly close to his elder brother who was 18 years of age. There was a huge difference.

When Thor entered Loki's chambers, Loki was still in the same position Frigga had left him in. He hadn't moved an inch. "Loki..." Thor spoke, his voice not as loud and full pride as usual.

Loki turned his head and looked at Thor, not sure of Thor's intentions. "Why are you here?" Loki asked, truly unaware.

"I'm here to apologise." Thor said, his voice filled with shame. Loki was surprised and Thor noticed. "I'm sorry, Loki."

For some reason, Loki knew that he just felt bad for him; he wasn't really sorry. He knew if Thor was ever asked to put his brother before the throne, he'd never do so.

But Loki didn't want to fight. He never did. He wanted to put it behind him. He didn't want to live every day hating his brother. "I forgive you." He said a moment later. "You do?" Thor asked in slight disbelief.

"I can't be angry at you for having priorities."

Thor felt his heart drop. He felt as if his heart was breaking. "Loki, don't say that." Thor said, almost pleadingly. Thor didn't want his brother to think so low of him. He walked closer to Loki, knelt and hugged him close. Just when he did, Loki flinched loudly.

"Let me go."

Thor pulled back, confused. "Wha- oh I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Thor grew anxious when he realised his wounds from yesterday were still fresh. "You can leave now, brother." He mumbled, pushing Thor gently. Although, his weak push had no affect on Thor's position. It had far that an affect on his feelings.

He gently, pat the back of his head with a sad smile and left.