My Husband and Our Lover

Chapter 2 Life is over.

My head feels like it's going to explode. I start to move about before opening my eyes but they just hurt to much. I just hurt so much...too much. Is it possible to hurt and be numb at the same time cause that's how I feel. Like this isn't my life and hopefully I'll wake soon. That or I'm just crazy.

I freeze when I hear voices coming closer to me. 'Play dead Abs just play dead or you know what act natural like your sleeping. How do I sleep that way I know how to act realistically. Oh shut up the voices are coming' I argue with myself. "I feel so horrible that she found out that way. We shouldn't have done that. What were we thinking? Why was she there at the office?" asked a voice I didn't recognize. "She was coming to have lunch with me. She always use to do that make lunch and surprise me with a meal for us to spend time together and also so that she made sure I ate. That was before life got in the way and we both got so busy. I feel like the worst person alive. I can't believe I hurt my angel so badly. That reaction was terrifying. She has never fainted before. I can't lose her Shane it is just not an option. I care for you but I can't lose my family." Edwin's voice rang out with an angry tone. "Well the ball is in your court Donovan. You tell me what to do. You want to walk away from me and pretend like nothing happened fine I'll do that for you and more importantly for her. You want to be with me and leave her" there was a pause... "I don't know if I'm okay with that. You know I have had feelings for Abigail. That's how this all started when you caught me fawning over your wife one to many times. When you confronted me I was honest with you and told you that I was in love with her. Of course you hated the idea and wanted  to kill me but as we started spending more time together on the Patterson project we were able to get to know one another and our feelings developed. It just seems right that the three of us would be together, but we went about this all the wrong way.  I don't know now.  I can't hurt bare to her anymore. That look in her eye with so much pain. The pain that we caused I can't do that again to her. However if you want the relationship that we have been discussing were all 3 of us can be together as one that I can do. That is what I want more then anything sense my feelings for you developed. The question is do you because sometimes I feel your love for her is more of an obsession so will it work sharing her? Plus let's not forget the burning question of does she even want this? I mean she must feel so betrayed." He spoke calmly. My head was spinning what the fuck were they going on about. I just found you two sleeping together behind my back and now your talking oh hey let's just have her join. FUCK....they call it a third wheel for a reason it just DOESN'T WORK. Oh and how long has this been going on with them? I stopped mid mind rant when Edwin says " I don't know if she will go with this now. I don't even know if she will want me anymore.  We literally just unfolded her worst fear in front of her and now say but hey be both want you to. Yeah I don't think so. Do I want this yes, but I want her happiness more. She is mine and I refuse to loss her ever. I will not let her our of my life because she is my life. "

I wiggle around to get their attention so they think I'm about to wake up. I wiggle so much and tried to act so natural that I feel off and hit my face off the floor. Well at least it was believable with how clumsy I am. "Well that is just delightful." I said as I was getting up off the floor from in front of the couch. Four strong arms lifted me up to the point I thought I was a Rocketeer for a moment. Gently placing me on the ground I gained my balance and stepped back realizing that I'm somehow in my family room . "Abigail we need to talk.... please." Edwin asked. "Its not necessary just tell me if you'd like Theo and I to leave or are you planning to leave yourself that way I know who's clothes to pack." I replied in a monotone voice.

"Abs please let me explain, I love you so fucking much baby. I'm sorry I never meant for this to get out of hand before we talked to you about everything." Edwin explained. "Out of hand .. out of hand." I laughed. "Oh Eddie we are way past out of hand. Out of hand would have been back when you stole my first kiss the night you came to my dorm after fucking Gavin Tempest in the parking lot after the football game. Being a gay men with a unsuspecting wife and a young son is way past out of hand and I didn't even bring the cheating into it yet." I said while let out humorless laughs.

" I'm not gay. Don't label me what I'm not." he stated as if I shouldn't be made at him as if I was wrong for my statement. 'Well fuck that." I fumed.

"No what you ARE is a LIAR and a CHEATER. How about those fucking labels asshole. Those fit you so fucking well just like SELFISH and CRUEL." I yelled.

"Listen please...I'm sorry, I didn't mean for this to happen like this. I've been stressed with no sleep and FUCK I let my guard down with him once...only once. It only happened that one time not that I expect you to believe me and I completely understand if you don't but it's the truth.  I'm sorry., so fucking sorry but this can be turned into a good thing. Shane makes me feel whole. He actually started out being interested in you and things slow progressed between him and I. We talked about everything for a long time and we want this with you. We want us three to be together." he said pacing the kitchen as he raked his hands through his hair.

"Well congratu...fucking...lations you feel whole. Hold on let me bake you a fucking cake and host you a fucking party." I replied as I rolled my eyes trying to not cry and show how much he has broken me. "Abby baby stop. I'm sorry, I really am.  You know you are my world....you know I need you. You are my everything." he spoke as he rounded the counter to grab me. While Mr. O'Connell or Shane as Edwin calls him just sits at the counter watching silently. "What you want me to make you some popcorn for the show? Hey would you like extra butter or cheese flavored you fucking asshole." I say to him with a leveling glare. "He just shakes his head and averts his eyes.

"No, you said it yourself he makes you feel whole. I'm nothing to you. What I was is no longer. I was your best friend. The best friends who you begged to give you a chance as you confessed your undying love for me. The best friend that gave into you pleas even though I said it wasn't a good idea because you were a player and you mainly went for males of which I could not compete with. Then I became the girlfriend who you had fall in love with you. The girlfriend you then turned into your wife and gave you my virtue. The wife whom you then turned into a mother as we conceived our son out of love. I'm also the Wife who walked in on you her beloved husband plowing into your co worker because like I said in the beginning I wouldn't be enough for you. Now I'm just nothing. Please leave because at the end of the day you cheated on my physically once okay we will go with once but you just admitted you have been growing feelings for one another for awhile so you have been emotionally cheating for a long time. I'm done, I'm done with you and this conversation so either you leaver or I will either way I can't be around you. You disgust my very being deep down into my core." I said as I walked out of the kitchen.