11: the heart is more difficult

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I paced back and forth across my room.
I just made out with Adrien Argeste.
Less than 45 minutes ago.
And less than 45 minutes ago Chloe Burgoise came in and ruined everything.
But that didn't matter. Adrien told me he loved me and he kissed me!
And better yet, I had a date with him as Marinette.
I was so excited.
"Marinette, are you forgetting that you need to patrol with Chat Noir. In five minutes. " My qwami reminded me.
"Thanks Tiki! I almost forgot. " I told her.
I held out my arms and said, "Tiki, spots on! "
I transformed into my alter ego.
Using my yo-yo, I flung myself across the city of Paris and met Chat Noir at the Eiffel Tower.
"Hey, bugaboo. How are you on this fine night. I noticed you went to that ball thing. How'd it go? "
"It was amazing... " I sighed remembering the kiss I shared with Adrien.
"What made it amazing? "
"This guy-well I've liked him for a while, kissed me. " I told him.
"Oh really? " Chat asked a smile on his face. And then confused. "You new that guy for a while?"
"Well I had a crush on him as my non ladybug self for a while. We go to school together. And he told me he loved me! " I said happily.
"And you, like him...? "
"Not like, love. " I told him matter of factly.
He smiled at me before taking off to patrol his area.
I did mine, thoughts of Adrien filling my head.
After patrolling, I briefly met with Chat Noir before heading home and detransforming.
I waited a couple moments, expecting Chat Noir to show up here, but he didn't.
I sighed as I entered my room and got ready for bed. It was midnight and I had school tomorrow.
"Do you think it was a good idea to tell Chat Noir about your crush? " Tiki asked me as I crawled into bed
"Yeah sure. Why not? "
"What if he figures out who you are because of it? "
"Ha! I doubt it. He's just a silly cat. " I replied.
"If you insist... "
"Goodnight Tiki."
"Sweet dreams, Marinette. "
I slept through the night peacefully and was surprised that I actually awoke for school on time.
I dressed up in my usual ensemble and was actually the first one in class today.
Adrien was the second.
"Hi Adrien. " I said as he walked in.
"Oh, hey Marinette. " He smiled at me.
"What time did you want to go to the movies tonight?" I asked him.
"What? " He asked confused.
"Our date....? "
"Oh Marinette, I'm sorry. I can't go."
"Thats okay. We can reschedule. " I offered.
"I mean we just can't. I'm in love with somebody else. "
"Wait, what, who?" I asked. I had literally kissed the guy last night and he told me that he loved me and wanted to know who I was without the mask.
The mask.
Oh dammit.
He loves Ladybug, not Marinette.
Crap.
I felt my heart drop into my stomach and dissolve in the acidity of it.
"I'm sorry Marinette."
"I-its okay. " I told him, suddenly not feeling well.
"Are-are you okay? " He asked concerned.
"Um...I'm not feeling well. "
"Do you need me to bring you to see the nurse? "
"No. I can go myself. " I said, getting out of my seat.
When I entered the nurses office, she sent me home immediately, not even bothering to check my vital.
My parents asked if I needed anything, but I just told them I was going to lay down.
And I layed and cried in my bed all day long.
Adrien was just like everyone else.
They loved Ladybug, the strong, brave beautiful superhero, Marinette the weak, clumsy girl.
"It's going to be okay, Marinette. " Tiki said, trying to cheer me up.
"I know, Tiki. I just need a little time."
It was maybe five p.m. when I heard a taping noise
I walked over and opened the door to the outside terrace, and saw none other than Chat Noir.
"Hey..." He started, as I let him into my room.
"I really don't want company right now, Kitty. " I said, covering my tear stained face with my hand.
"Were....you crying? "
"No.... "
Chat moved my hand from my face, and looked at me with what seemed like guilt.
He pulled me into a tight hug.
We stayed that way for a long time until Chat sat me down on my bed.
"Why...um, why we're you crying? " Chat asked.
"It's stupid, don't worry about it kitty." I told him, forcing a smile.
"Hey. If your upset about something, it's not stupid, ok? " Chat said.
"Ok." I told him wiping my tears off my face with the back of my hand.
"Good. Now get some sleep and I will see you tomorrow, ok princess?"
"Ok kitty. "
And without another word, he left.

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