Nicki
I woke up out of my slumber to loud screaming, which had been common on nights like these. It was approaching the holidays and it was around the time where my parents argued frequently. There were times where they couldn't even be around each other without arguing or attacking the other. Times where my mother would come and sleep in my bed to hide from the horrid rages of my under the influence father.
Like most black fathers in my neighborhood, he was addicted to drugs. The drugs that infected the streets of New York generations ago. My dad is almost never sober, I can only recall him being sober once or twice in my lifetime and those moments were always the saddest for him. He used drugs as an escape from our life, the life that we had lived because of the mistakes my parents made. But all glory to God, they found way to make sure my brothers and I were clothed, fed, and sheltered.
Inside my father was vacancy, he no longer found joy in things, just anger. He was always mad. Always bitter. Always uptight.
My mother put up with it though, as she was the only woman who ever has. And he was the only man who had ever treated her like this.
I have two brothers, Micaiah, and Ehmiri, I was the middle child and my brother had already started a life with his current girlfriend. Ehmiri was fortunate enough to not have to witness the horrid of this abode.
"Nicki," my little brother Micaiah called out to me from my bedroom door.
"Come here," I whispered to him.
He always came into my room whenever they started arguing because eventually it turned into an entire fist fight.
"I don't want daddy to hit mommy anymore," he whined as tears started to roll down his cheeks.
My little brother is nine years old, five years apart from me.
"It makes me so angry," he continued.
"Me too," I said as I tried to keep the tears from falling from my eyes.
I tried to stay strong for my brother because if I showed weakness he would show it often as well and I didn't want that for him.
After a while the arguing and the movement came to a halt, meaning my mother or my father must have left out.
In a few moments I started to hear footsteps towards my room, my father stumbled his way into my room, clearly too high to even realize where he was.
"Daddy why are you in here?" Micaiah asked.
"Go to your room, I have to talk to your sister."
Micaiah did as he was told and my father just watched him as he walked out.
"Hey sweetheart," he said to me.
I sat still, I viewed his faint face as the darkness of the nighttime wouldn't allow me to see his features, but he made sure his presence was felt.
My eyeballs peered at his distinct movements throughout my room to get close to me.
The closer he got the more I froze.
He sat down on my bed and whispered, "there's no need to fear me babygirl. I'm going to make you feel good."
My jaw clenched and my body stiffened, tears flew down my cheek and I-
"Nicki baby!" I heard.
"Nic wake up!" My mom said and I finally opened my eyes and snapped back to reality.
