Idol destiny 🌈

19

D-2

Counting day by day on calendar still not decide anything yet . What make me more confused is...why he's not even call me nor text me ~ it's that really last meet ? Last I see you there ? Last hearing your voice there also ~

Watching how beautiful city in this Seoul to make me calm all the way , but it's not work like always . 2 weeks my mind can't even working to make a decision . Why ? I still don't know , that's what I'm told my self over and over again .

It's that the real reasons Kim y/n ? Well~ a lie always make someone feel calm outside but inside ? nope , sorry to say but it's not working deep inside you y/n .

Mom dad ?

Where are them when I'm feel lonely like this ? Where are them to help their own daughter ? I'm not expect them to help me because they even don't know how their child life . What a sad family .

Brother ?

Yes , I always asking for him to help me . But not this time because I don't want to burden him again . Enough that he suffer to study and get a nice job and not forget take care of me to feel comfy but how about him ? He always put me first before him .

Kim y/n the girl that lack of love from her parents , but her brother also don't get any love from them . Well ~ his can , why she can't right ? . All his matter he can resolved by his own not even refer to anyone , so she also have being like her brother too . How much pain is , how much hurt is , just believed to god plans and time ? Will say everything .

Words saying not enough to make everything clear ,
Speech never help someone from to keep away to lie ,
Body never help someone to feel more warm ,

To make all those perfect they need company .

D-1

I still not decide to come or not , I'm not even tell my brother about Baekhyun last favor . Yeah I know I should but I can't . Why ? Like I said before , and I found another reason .

Searching reasons to lose him not because of his career .

And how about

What if I lost myself at everything on that time and make my soul more worst ?

That time ,

My heart say yes
My body say no
My eyes say yes
My mouth say no

My heart and eyes miss him
But not body and mouth that always lied to dear self  .

I snap back when my door knock by someone . I just shout to him so that he have permission to come in but he's not come in instead just standing at the door frame and crossed his hand over his chest , smiling .

He's not working since today it's Saturday ~ and the concert will be on Sunday . Tomorrow night on 7 PM , to be in queue start on early morning .

Yeol : what are you thinking princess ?

He still smiling

Me : ah ? Oh ... I'm just ... uhm nothing yeah nothing .. just thinking about .... future ! yeah future ...

And of course I stuttered just because he caught me

Yeol : look ! my girl , you being so much dazing out from this earth ~ what's wrong huh ?