I love you but I just can't tell you everything (a supercorp fanfic)

I admit it Im a Luther

•~Lena's point of view~•

I cough loudly feeling like I'm dying, I put my hand over my mouth, I may be locked in a cell but I'm still a lady, so manners are important. I put my hand on my head trying to figure out what exactly is going on and how long I was out, which was.. well I don't even know, but the lights are in around me, I can finally see everything in the room, big shelves filled with broken and destroyed cardboard boxes, the lights on the left hand side of the box keep flickering on and off causing me a headache, making me feel like I'm going insane. The man are all standing around me once again there black hoods making them all look like insaniacs, which they probably are.
"Hello miss Luther, we are rumba a group who captures evil criminals such as you and your brother, so miss Luther I hope your ready to spend the rest of your days rotting in this cell," they say, the rumba why is that familiar, but at the same time so random and out there, but so aggghhhhh I recognise it but I don't know where from,
"I'm Lena Luther let me out or maybe I'll become a Luther and follow in my brothers and my mothers destiny and kill you, all of you" I say smiling, wait did I just admit it, did I just admit that I'm a Luther that would explain there eye movements they don't believe what I just said and honesty neither do i,
"That's right you heard me I admit it I'm a Luther maybe it's time I started acting like one" I say lifting up my eyebrows meaning I mean business and will deliver on my  threat,
"I'm a Luther whether or not I want to be, in a Luther and I'm proud I'm not perfect far from it but I can do anything because I'm a Luther, and well I work with supergirl sometimes the government many many people who will be looking for me who will shoot first, ask questions never, okay, that's right you heard me a super and a Luther do work very well together" I say smiling smugly once again trying to convince them when I myself are not even sure what I'm talking about. I guess I'm just trying to convince myself I'll be okay and I won't die in this stupid cell that I'll get out and back to kara back to l corp, back to national city, back to my home, back to my life. Then the rumba or whatever they call themselves disappear and the lights go out, once again I'm left alone in darkness. What did I do to deserve this, what did I do to get thrown in a cell and told I'm gonna rot in one for the rest of my life. Nothing that's what I've done, absolutely nothing, but per usual they make assumptions about me, and I'm so bloody annoyed about it, they assume that because lex and Lillian are bad that I will be to, that the apple doesn't fall from the tree that my mother had darkness my brother had darkness and that I have darkness. And I just admitted to it, aghh what is wrong with me, I just admitted to being a Luther and like yeah that's honest but seriously why me why, aghhh I'm not a Luther, as in I am but I'm not like lex I'm not evil no matter how many times people say I am people say oh she's a Luther she's evil don't trust her, how many times people drag my name through the dirt like I'm not even a human being who is standing right behind them. What I wouldn't give right now to be back in my office eating take away with Kara and having fun and finally admitting my feelings to her the fact that I live kara, because she's the best most amazing beautiful wonderful person I've ever met and I want her to be okay I want her to be fine, but I know she's not and I want to be with her if, if I have to say goodbye, no don't think like that she's supergirl but she's also Kara, and she has weakness everyone does and I don't want to think about it but what if she or I don't make it, what then? Don't think about that you'll be fine you have survived situations way worse than this and you have come out alive every single time and Kara she is so strong she will be fine, I tell myself these things over and over again desperately wanting to believe them and after a while I do but deep down I think what will happen if I die or if kara dies and I try to stop thinking about it but I can't help it it's almost natural. I start fiddling with my hair trying to think of something to do or a way to get out but I just twist the same lock of hair around my finger again and again and again getting no ideas or any thoughts, and I just sit laying against the back on the cell twirling a lick of hair around my finger again and again and again.

•~Alex's point of view~•

"Alex, Alex, alex" I hear a voice saying over and over again,
"5 more minutes mum" I say rolling over and keeping my eyes closed,
"Umm Alex it's Winn" Winn says and I open my eyes and sit up instantly,
"Ohh Umm ignore everything I just said or I'll kill you, what happened?" I ask sitting up and realising I'm sitting on the floor in a corridor of the deo, my memory is a bit foggy after finding out that Lena is being held for ransom and rushing of somewhere,
"Umm honestly I'm not sure I started looking for you after you ran of and I found you collapsed here in the corridor, I only stated looking for you 10 minutes ago and you ran of 10 minutes or so before that so you were out for I recognise 20 to 25 minutes maybe less or maybe more you know I can't tell don't have a good memory And it's very hard to find clocks in the.." Winn says
"I get it" I say putting my hand out and Winn pulls me up and I get back on my feet trying to remember why I ran off but it's all foggy so I have no idea.
"Let's try and find Lena at the moment that's the best idea I got" I say and I take a deep breathe and slowly walk back to the cortex with Winn,
"How is the facial scan going, there is no result with the satellite but maybe looking through all security footage from all the buildings everywhere in and around national city" I say and a few agents nod there heads and turn around to face there computer screens again scrolling through hours and hours of security tape in the space of minutes.
"We have to find, we have to, we have to find her, we have to find her for kara." I say