HIM ♕ Jason McCann

Chapter Twenty One

|Jason|

The drive home from Felicia's house was longer than usual. I found myself thinking about her a lot, recently. Going slow was something new for me. For fuck's sake, I had never even been into something to take it at a speed. I stopped at the signal when I spotted an area with flickering lights. As the signal turned green, I instantly recognized that it was a night club as I could hear the music shaking up the whole building. I shook my head with a smile. It's been god knows how long since I have been to a club. I smirked at the faint memories of taking a girl home almost every night.

After all, I might as well admit that my looks were undeniably admirable.

With the increasing intimacy with Felicia, I knew all along something like this was going to happen to me. The slight changes in my life started to appear distinct as I seemed to introspect myself. I did not know whether a slight part of me misses that lifestyl, but I was sure that would not remove Felicia from my life. Not now, not ever.

Or would I?

I emptied the thoughts from my mind, but it was hard. Especially when you know a girl like Felicia. I was doubtful about commitments, but my fascination for her came in the way. I found it amusing, sometimes, how I can make her melt right then and there with just my presence. How can one not desire for such sort of feeling of domination?

Once I had reached home, I threw my car keys onto the counter, not giving a shit about whether they landed on the spot I aimed for or not and flinged myself onto the couch. I closed my eyes and let my mind wander back into my sea of thoughts. Being who I was, people found it appalling that I think a lot. My actions spoke otherwise as to how thoughtful I was. Was I really not being myself in the eyes of others? But at the same time, this was my lifestyle. Yes, causing trouble was my lifestyle. I yearned it, I needed it and worst of all, I loved it.

Or did I?

I should stop doubting my actions and my way of thinking.

My thoughts deliberately shifted to Felicia. The image of her short frame made itself into my mind. Her hair was long and the color of mystic black. She aways had her hair tied up which I did not understand why. I had always imagined her to look hot with her hair cascading over her breasts. Her breasts. Never once had I missed the anticipation of replacing her T-Shirt which hugged her breasts perfectly, with my own hands. The way her legs would press up against each other everytime I'd touch her. Oh, how many wonders can that body do? Her luscious lips never failed to invite mine onto them. The gasp escaping her mouth everytime I'd kiss her neck. What is she doing to me?

I quickly grabbed mt notebook and finished the rest of the lyrics for song which I was going to perform tomorrow right after Felicia. I wanted to surprise her about my performance. Since when did I, Jason McCann, found a sudden interest for surprises? The curves of her body made the hair stand still on my neck. How was it possible for someone to be this perfect?

Oh, your body is such a burn.
Spreadin' round the room like butter,
Nah nah nah, back down like a reactor.
You're so infectious.
Such an epidemic.
Man, everybody play with interest.
Cause I'm dead, only thing left to do is mourn.
Moment of silence.
If I'm dead, the only thing I could do is mourn.
Now, it's beyond too late.

I finished off the lyrics. I rubbed my face with my hands. The explicit features which I was fighting, for some reason, just made me want her more. Want her to myself. I inhaled harshly and let myself fall asleep. I've got a long day tomorrow.