Deer Luhan, With Love

63

Chapter 63 – In Which Sehun Is Once Again the Only EXO Member Able to Distinguish Me From Luhan

Deer Luhan,

I think my hatred of all things bubble tea is perfectly justifiable.

Leigh

It had been fun enough watching the chaos whenever Luhan and I decided to prank everybody by pretending to be Luhan, but watching them all falling over each other with anxiety not to do something inappropriate to “the wrong girl”, as Lay had put it, was beyond hysterical.  Kai had been the most adventurous, opting for the juvenile bra-snapping thing a lot of boys had found funny to do around the age of fourteen back when I was still in school.  I still have no idea what he hoped to achieve by it, because Luhan and I both gave identical reactions of shock and ended up cornering him between two potted geraniums on one of the balconies before he apologised and asked for a ceasefire.

Kris tried only speaking to us in English, but it was one that had been tried before when we were both pretending to be Luhan, so the pair of us treated it as though it was a language we’d never come across and didn’t respond at all.  That said, he did nearly get us when he struck up conversation in English with D.O. and the pair of them – probably D.O.’s idea, actually – started deliberately mispronouncing things and getting facts for things they knew I knew wrong in an attempt to get a rise out of me.

Tao’s contribution was an explanation of the Challenge game to the EXO-K members during lunch, after which Luhan and I came to a mutual agreement to keep silent so we couldn’t get trapped, and Sehun and Suho left when Chanyeol and Baekhyun got themselves challenged into balcony hopping, Suho muttering something about not being able to deal with a bunch of kids anymore.

Chen and Lay were just stumped and spent quite literally hours sitting on a pair of chairs in front of me and Luhan and staring at us as if doing it long enough would make true names ping up on holographs in front of them.

“The prawn is getting seriously tempting right now,” I heard Lay murmuring to Chen as I humoured Luhan with a dance-off to a couple of Orange Caramel songs.  “I don’t know if it’s scarier that Leigh makes a very convincing boy or Luhan makes a very convincing girl.”

He flinched when Luhan plopped seductively down in his lap and caressed his cheek, cooing “my funny honey!”

“Go away,” Lay complained, pushing at him.  “I don’t know which one you are!”

I draped my arms around him from behind, sandwiching him between the pair of us, and I was pretty sure I felt his shoulders tense as he let out a breathy curse.

“You know,” observed Chen, propping his chin up on his right hand, “I think I actually pity Sehun.  This must be hellish for him if even he can’t tell them apart.”

“I challenge you to eat a whole lemon!” Baekhyun called out to Chanyeol, brandishing the yellow fruit.

“Baekhyun, that’s not how it works,” Xiumin tried to tell him, but Baekhyun was already tugging Chanyeol in my direction.

“Girls!” he yelled.  Luhan and I both looked up.

“D*mn,” said Chanyeol.  “Luhan doesn’t even react to being called a girl.”

“Maybe because you spend most of your time teasing him about being pretty,” Xiumin pointed out.  Baekhyun shushed him with a wave of his hand.

“If I challenge Chanyeol to eat a whole lemon, he has to do it, doesn’t he?”

“No,” said Luhan and I together.