Play It Safe (A Kendall Schmidt Fanfic)

Chapter 10

"Sophia! Look who's her-" Gabby's voice started as I turned to look at her. She grinned as she saw Kendall. She was pointing in a direction when I could see James's and Carlos's head in the crowd. Logan must've been who she was staring at earlier.

"Oh, I see you found Kendall." She said backing away and then running back into the crowd as if we were wild animals and she was escaping us before we attacked her. I giggled and blushed.

"She's a wild one isn't she?" Kendall asked laughing. I sighed and rested my chin on my hand.

"Yeah, she is." I told him and then looked at him. He was looking at me strange.

"So, I wasn't going to bring this up, but I think I will now." Kendall said as I sat up straight again. He looked at his own empty glass and ran his index finger around the rim. "So you kissed me." He said still staring down. I blushed instantly as I winced. Should've known this was coming.

"Oh gosh. I know." I said laughing and hiding my face in my hands. He laughed seeing my reaction.

"Was I that bad? I mean, really?" Kendall asked thinking I was embarrassed that I kissed him. I laughed, taking a breath before I looked at him.

"No, no. I mean, I did that because I thought we weren't ever going to see each other again." I told him. He nodded as if he understood. But I could sense that was still worded wrong. Kendall also seemed to not fully get it either.

"Ah, how can I say this without sounding creepy?" I questioned aloud as Kendall touched my shoulder.

"Just say it. I'm pretty sure you're not going to say anything I haven't read on twitter." Kendall said. I laughed and knew that was true.

"Okay, so I have admired you from afar, you know I'm a rusher. I really am. I've watched the show, listened to the music since two-thousand and nine. So, when I was always alone, after I did all my homework and plus some, I would watch your show. Big Time Rush was my happiness in a very dark life, ya know? I was alone, always alone. I would get my happiness from four dorks who sang like baby cherubs and acted like twelve year olds when they were really twenty two." I said laughing awkwardly because I felt awkward. Kendall's smile was warm, and honest.

"So you met us, you thought it was the last time you'd see the guys you admired and looked up to because they made you happy, so you laid a big one on the dorkiest of the group?" Kendall asked as he made me feel better about what I had just told him.

"Basically." I told him sighing and laughing a little more comfortable. He was the dorkiest, but that also what I loved about him.

"Ah, I'm relieved." Kendall said with a great big sigh.

"Relieved?" I asked him worried.

"I thought you kissed me because you wanted the DNA to clone me or something. Fangirls are scary." Kendall said laughing. I covered my face at his dorkiness.

"Ha, no. Not even close." I told him. He smiled at me.

"So, do you have a list or something?" He asked as I was leaning back in the couch to get comfortable. I furrowed my brow.

"A list?" I asked him. He sat his glass on the table close by.

"Yeah a list." He said. I shrugged still confused. "You want to loosen up and live life, so what are you wanting to do? Do you have a list?" He asked with dimples forming on his cheeks. I smiled down at my feet.

"A mental list." I told him so he wouldn't ask to see anything. He nodded.

"Tell me it. Maybe I can help." He said. I squinted at him trying to read him. My face fell as my eyes studied him.

"Are you serious?" I asked him sort of sounding breathless unintentionally. He nodded with the same genuinely warm smile.

"Uh," I cleared my throat and then started to list my wishes. "First of ten, and no they aren't in particular order. I'd like to go on a late night adventure with some friends. Like get a random call at midnight, we all go out in pajamas and sweats and we just go to a parking lot somewhere with music and dance and have fun." I said as a smile formed on his lips. "Don't make fun of me, okay? I never lived life like this, okay?" I said self conscious then. He shook his head.

"No, no. It's amusing in the sense that I haven't done that either. So continue. I'm not making fun, just listening." He assured me touching my hand for a second with his. I nodded and took a deep breath.

"Second, I want to go on a real road trip, I've been flown everywhere and it doesn't impress me. I want a real road trip with friends in an actual Volkswagen bus like I'm in the sixties." I said as Kendall smiled brightly and nodded. "Third, I want to go to an actual amusement park." I told him. He held up a hand to silence me as I raised my brow.

"You've never been to an amusement park? At all?" He asked. I shook my head with a sad smile. He gave me a sympathetic look. "Dang, okay continue." He said leaning back again.

"Four, I want to try, uh, weed." I said quietly as I looked to my heels and then back up to him. He smirked.

"Where are you from?" He asked knowingly. I blushed and knew this was coming.

"Colorado, yes I know. You're shocked I've never smoked before since it's legal." I said as he nodded. "Anyway! Five, get drunk for the first time." I told him. He nodded and kept listening. "Six, uhm," I took a second to look at him as his eyes urged me to continue. "I want to have sex." I blurted out as he smiled.

"You've never-" he said. I glared at him.

"What happened to not making fun of me?" I asked him. He shook his head.

"I'm not making fun. Just tell me the rest. If you can blurt out that you haven't had sex or smoked and you're eighteen from Colorado,  I think you can blurt anything else out and it won't be a surprise." Kendall said touching my thigh as a conformation. I nodded. God, those eyes attacked me and made me feel all warm on the inside.

"Okay, seven and eight are similar, I want to get a tattoo and I want something pierced not on my ear." I told him as he snickered. I glared again but continued. "Nine, is also a pretty sad one. I want a real boyfriend. Not this high school type relationship where you break up and get back together like it's nothing every month." I told him rolling my eyes at even my own past relationships where I hadn't even let the boys kiss me before. Obviously, they never lasted long.

"That's an understandable one." He agreed with me. I waited a moment before I said number ten. He watched me a moment. "What's number ten?" He asked. I sighed and looked into the crowd. I could see couples dancing around as if it was normal to be with one another, while I sat here talking to the man of my dreams while telling him my most personal information ever.

"Number ten, fall in love, even though I know it isn't for forever." I told him reluctantly and met his eyes for a moment but then looked down at my feet. If anything, I could cross that off because I was in love with this man in front of me, but I knew it was one sided and a dream at best to imagine a world where he loved me back and we stayed together forever. It was hardly plausible to even dream of.