Suicide Squad: Parent Scenarios

They Take Care of You

A/N- In Joker's and Harley's story it will be split into two stories to see how Harley would take care of you vs. how Joker would. 

Joker & Harley-  One day  you were playing with your new mommy in hers and your daddy's bedroom. "Who's mommy's happy little baby? Who's mommy's happy little baby? You are! Wes you are. Oh wes you are, my sweet baby girl/boy." She cooed in a baby voice.  "Harley?" "Hmm?" "The boss wants to see you." Frost said. "Okay. I'll be out in a minute. I have to dress y/n. I can't have a naked baby on the lose. Can we sweetie?" She cooed as she tickled you under your chin. 

"Aw now you look just like mommy/Daddy. Now let's go see Daddy." She cooed. Your mommy knocked on your daddy's office door. "Commmmme innnnn." "Hi Daddy. Say hi to Daddy, y/n."  Your mommy said as your daddy made grabby hands at you. "Well now. Don't we look pretty/ handsome today." He cooed. You sat on your daddy's lap and play with his chains while your mommy and daddy talked. "Well Harley. Daddy has a heist today, so youuuuuuuu will be watchin' lil clown while Daddy's out." "But Puddin' you never get to spend anytime  with y/n.  When was the last time you did spend time with her/him? Last night, before I got her/him back to bed." He said.  "Well I guess I'm the better the parent." She said smartly. "Excuse me? You're the better parent?! I don't think so. I'm wayyyyyyy better at parenting than you are." "Oh really? Wanna bet? If I win, you'll have to babysit y/n for a month. Which means no heists, robberies, etc.. No crime whatsoever. Also none of the guys can't help you babysit."  "And if I win?" "I'll babysit for a month plus do whatever you want. Deal?" "Deal. When does this bet take place?" "Tomorrow and may the best parent win." They said as they shock hands. "What do you think lil clown? Do ya think that Daddy's a good daddy?" He asked you but you were too busy playing with his chains. "You love Daddy's chains, don't ya, baby girl/boy? Well when you're older Daddy will get you your own set of chains." He cooed. After a while you got sleepy and your daddy watched as you snuggled into him and gave out a cute little yawn. Your daddy made sure that no one was around so he could snuggle you up and give you a kiss on your head. "Goodnight y/n. Daddy l-l-loves you." He said as he placed you into your pack and play.  He went out to the heist, while your mommy watched you.  "What shall we do today, y/n? I know. How about we go see aunties Kitty and Ivy? Would ya like that?" She cooed as you smiled and make cute baby sounds. "Alright lil clown. We'll go see them."    (Time skip to Catwoman's & Ivy's apartment.) "Selina? Can you get that? I'm busy watering my babies." "Sure. Harley?" "Hiya Kitty." "OMG! I haven't seen you in forever! Ivy! Harley's here!" "So who is that?" "This is y/n. She's/he's mine and Mr. J's baby." "You mean the two of you had-" "No! Mr. J and I found a baby outside of the nightclub one night and became y/n's new mommy and Daddy. Isn't that right my lil Puddin' cup?" She cooed. "Well Harley. Y/n is just the sweetest baby ever." Catwoman cooed. Just then you got hungry, so you began to cry. "There, there y/n. Shh... Mommy's here. Mommy's here." "Maybe she's/he's hungry Harls." Ivy said as she grabbed a baby bottle from the bag.  "Here ya go, my sweet baby girl/boy." Your mommy cooed. After you had a full tummy, you got to play with one of your aunt Selina's cats, which was Isis. At first you were afraid, but she was a sweet cat. "So how's the clown taking "fatherhood"?" Ivy asked. "Well..." "Harley. Please don't tell us that it's just you taking care of y/n." "For now it's been me. But I know Mr. J will help out."  "Harls. You need to put your foot down and tell him that he's a father now and needs to do his part!" Ivy yelled making you whimper. "Ivy's right, Harley. Joker needs to do his part, because if he doesn't, you should leave him." Catwoman said as she was rocking you to sleep. "Y/n needs both her/his  parents, for I seen a lot of single mothers just trying to make ends."  Your mommy sat at the counter thinking about what Selina and Ivy said.