McPriceley Oneshots

Excuse Me, Can I Interest You in Our Lord and Savior?

Kevin's POV

"What is this?" I grumble, hoisting up the box that Elder Cunningham just dropped in front of my bed.

"It was in the mail!" Elder Cunningham squeals. "From Salt Lake City!"

I bounce the cardboard box gently in my hands, getting the feel. "Why does it have holes?"

Elder Cunningham gasps. "Air holes?"

I roll my eyes, but I can feel my heart squeeze as I get the scissors from my dresser. My parents didn't. They never listened to my requests as a child, so they wouldn't have now...

I rip open the packing tape with the scissors eagerly, greeted with a note. 

Dear Kevin,

We heard that the mission was going great! As a reward for all of the baptisms, your father and I thought you deserve a gift.

Love-

I don't finish the note, due to a small furry gray paw swiping the letter down from my hands and back into the box. I stick my hands into the box as Elder Cunningham jumps up and down excitedly, and pull out a small gray floof of a creature. 

"It's a CAT!" Elder Cunningham screams, grabbing the kitten from my arms and cuddling it against his face. "Oh my goodness!"

"They didn't..." I mumble, retrieving the cat from his arms. It comfortably crawls into my arms, snuggling it's small head against my shoulder as I smile softly. "I've been asking for one since I was ten. My parents were uncomfortable around them, but now..."

Elder Cunningham, not bothering to listen to my recounting quickly exclaims, "Is it a boy or a girl?"

"Uhm... Boy."

"What are you going to name him?" Elder Cunningham asks, bouncing.

"I don't know," I mutter, clutching the cat closer and opening the door. I walk down the stairs and into the living room, where the rest of the elders are playing Monopoly. They all turn their heads to face me as I settle into an armchair as the cat climbs all over my legs and chest before settling on my abdomen.

"Who's this?" Elder Church asks, concealing a smile.

"This," I say as coolly as I can, "is my new cat."

"You don't have a name for them yet?" Elder Zelder asks, looking scandalized. 

"He doesn't have one yet, no," I say, petting the gray head on the top of the ball of fur's head. 

"Name him Elephant, call him Ellie!"

"Ellie's a girl's name, name him Smokey!"

"Name him after Nambajamba!" 

"I'm not naming my cat after your girlfriend Nabulungi," I sigh at Elder Cunningham. "I just don't know yet."

"Name him Pawseph Smith!" Elder McKinley suggests, and my head snaps him. The ginger's cheeks flood with red but he holds his ground. "Like Joseph?"

"I don't want to insult Heavenly Father," I say decidedly, shying away from Elder McKinley's gaze. 

Elder McKinely stands and walks around the coffee table and the surrounding elders and kneels in front of me. My face most likely resembles a strawberry, but it only gets worse as he picks up the cat from my chest and holding him underneath his front two legs so the cat stands on his hind legs on my knee.

"Pwease, Elder Price," Elder McKinley says in a childish voice. "My name is Pawseph Smith. Can I interest you in our lord and savior?"

"You're sounding like a Catholic," I say, laughing slightly as the elder dances the cat around in the air. The gray fluff wears a very disgruntled look, his pink tongue a blip from his mouth. 

"I don't care," Elder McKinley says, resting the cat on his bottom on my leg. "Pawseph Smith is perfect for him!" He insists, returning to his normal voice. 

".... Fine," I say, pretending to be annoyed as Elder McKinley does a victory dance. I smile softly as he smiles back down at me. As soon as he turns away I pick up the cat and hold him against my chest. "Okay, Pawseph Smith. You better earn your name, alright."

"Mrow."

"I'll take that as a yes."

~~~*Time skip brought by my trashcan self*~~~

"Can I say goodnight to Pawseph?" Elder McKinley asks, poking his head into my room. I'm sitting on my bed rereading the Book of Arnold, Pawseph nestled against my neck. 

I nod and put down my book, lifting the cat and holding him out. Elder McKinley sits next to me on the bed and holds Pawseph gingerly and tenderly in his arms, booping him on the nose repeatedly while continuously murmuring "Boop... and a boop.... and another boop... sneak attack boop... oh em gosh, another boop...." It's incredibly endearing. I can't help but watch the adorable look on Elder McKinley's face as he cuddles the cat. 

"If you ever want to hang out with Pawseph Smith," I say, clearing my throat and not making eye contact with Elder McKinley. "We'll be in here."

My face heats up as Elder McKinley goes quiet, and I'm about to take it back-

I feel an object on my shoulder. I turn my head, and see the man resting his head on my shoulder, his hair brushing the crook of my neck. I smile softly, and nestle into my pillow a bit more before resting my head on his. Pawseph Smith roams from Elder McKinley's arms to stretching between both our laps. 

"I'll be over often," the ginger whispers, and I almost whoop. 

Almost.

Arnold's POV (BETCHA WEREN'T EXPECTING THAT HUH)

I stumble into the missionary hut, a little high from the donuts I had at Nintendo's. There was so much sugar.

I make my way up the stairs, and push open the door to my room. Elder Price and Elder McKinley sit shoulder to shoulder, head's resting upon each others, their hands entwined over Pawseph Smith's sleeping form as they let out little snore.

"Oh my goodness.... Pawseph is so cute!" I coo. I reach over to pet the cat, and go to bed. I love having a cat here. 

965 words- pretty good!

Idk, I could see Kevin with a cat. Connor would be all over that cat though, you gotta admit. And I'm always here for pet name puns. I'm still waiting to get a cat to name Schrödinger. 

And requests still open! I love requests so deal with it- there'll be a reminder for them at the end of each chapter! 

Love you guys!

-Em