All These Years (Muke/Cashton)

Ch. 7 - Hold On, If You Feel Like Letting Go

*Ashton's P.O.V*

The sound of someone sniffling wakes me up... Well, kind of...

I'm standing beside the hospital bed again, staring down at my still unconscious body. I look up to see Michael closing the door

I watch Michael as he pulls a chair over to my bed and sits down. His face is all blotchy like he's been crying, his eyes look bloodshot, like he's been rubbing them to get rid of tears, his hair looks like it had been styled like normal, but has been messed up by him running his hands through it... And there are dark circles underneath his eyes, how much sleep has he been getting?

"Ash, you need to wake up" he sobs, gently grabbing my body's hand.

"You don't think I know that already?" I snap at him, rolling my eyes. "How the fuck can I?" I ask irritably.

"It's just- it's Calum" he says quietly.

"What about him?" I ask, suddenly worried. I kneel down beside Michael, desperate for him to keep talking.

"He's-" he pauses, like the words are hard to spit out. "He's been drinking..." He finally finishes.

"I know... I saw him when he got home" I tell him. I'd been there, only for a moment, when Calum came stumbling home. I spoke to him and I if I didn't know any better, I'd swear he heard me.

"You've only been in here for two weeks... But he's getting really bad" Michael says, starting to tear up.

"Two weeks?" I ask shocked. "He got worse from when I saw him?" I ask worryingly.

"The kids are starting to ask where you are... We had to lie to them and tell them you just needed a bit of a break" he says.

"I'm sorry you had to lie to them" I whisper.

"And the fans- oh god the fans" he says, bursting into tears at the mention of the FAM.

"You had to tell them, didn't you?" I ask, tears slipping from my eyes.

Michael's crying right in front of me and all I want to do is be the big brother I always was with him and wrap my arms around him tightly and tell him everything will be alright.

But I can't do that... And I'm not sure everything will be alright.

"We had to tell them" he sobs, half covering his face with his free hand. "We had to tell them you were in a coma... We didn't say how you ended up in it but they all have their theories" he says though little sobs.

"And I bet ending up comatose from a suicide attempt crossed their minds, right?" I ask.

"Most of them think it's because you tried to kill yourself.... Oh god, they are so upset about it all" he cries.

"Tell our beautiful fans how much I'm in love with them, tell them I'll be okay" I sob.

"It's Calum I'm most worried about though" he says quietly.

"Where is he?" I ask curiously.

"Luke is looking after him at the moment, when I left, Calum was asleep, snuggled up to Luke" he explains. "But I'm just so worried about him, he's breaking apart" he sighs.

"HELP HIM" I shout. "HELP HIM I DONT CARE HOW JUST HELP HIM" my screams turn into sobs.

The beeping noise coming from the heart monitor speeds up, but only a bit. I turn to the heart monitor for a second before turning back to Michael, who's looking at it in confusion. He stands up and moves closer to my body. He places his hand gently over my chest to feel my heartbeat.