So when does it stop? The pain. I've done all the things you told me to do. I've held on and I keep going. Waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel to embrace me. Waiting to even see the light at the end of the tunnel.
When does it stop? The sadness. I've apologized and have been forgiven. I've righted all my wrongs. I'm trying my best to be optimistic. So when does it stop?
When does depression become a problem? When I'm feeling sad. When I cry myself to sleep? when I dont eat for days at a time because I don't feel anything but a stabbing sadness in my gut? When the blade punctures my skin? Or is it when I can finally become released from the living hellhole I'm trapped in? When I never get to see the people I've let down? When the I can never hurt the people I loved? Then does it end? Or maybe I'm cursed to always feel this way. Maybe it will never stop. Maybe I dont deserve for it to stop.
~ Rose 2018
