DESPITE IT BEING the weekend, Lindy was offered a Saturday night shift at the hospital in place of a nurse who wanted to take Lindy's Tuesday shift instead. An even trade which Lindy could have probably used to get her mind off of things.
As much as she could have used the distraction, she declined the offer. She had later chided herself for refusing, wondering why she wouldn't have traded a night of racing thoughts for something more balanced.
But this weekend was an important weekend.
Kurt was to be alone in his Seattle home for the first time in weeks. Courtney had left him to travel to Los Angeles, where she planned to take part in a 'hotel detox' that would hopefully help her to kick her own addiction. Frances and her nanny had gone too, leaving Kurt alone in the house except for the presence of Cali, who Lindy had learned was one of Frances's ex-nannies.
Kurt had hinted to Lindy that he would have liked for her to join him in his home while he was alone, but she'd turned him down. It was too weird for her to enter his house as if he did not share it with another woman. Despite whatever viciousness Courtney may have shown in the past, Lindy couldn't find it in her heart to disrespect her. And bedsides, Cali was there — Kurt swore that he wouldn't rat on them as long as he was doped up, but Lindy thought it to be too risky.
She guessed that she had been stupid to imagine that they would have spent all of their free time together, holed up in her apartment just as they had done in the good old days. Kurt had his heroin to tend to and when Lindy could not reach him, she assumed with a heavy heart that he was occupied with something more perverse.
So with that in mind, she situated herself on the couch for her lonely Saturday evening with a bowl of cereal and cartoons playing. She had tried to read her pregnancy book, but the joy of being pregnant was greatly subdued by Kurt's disheartening mental and physical state.
She was going to have to tell him soon.
If Lindy wanted Kurt alive so that he would witness the birth and life of their child, she would have to confess that she was pregnant. It bothered her, as she had never wanted to use the baby as a final ultimatum, but she was soon to be left without a choice.
Beth, Jack and Trae had all called her house phone, voicing their concerns that maybe Lindy had decidedly cut things too close. They were all aware of how badly Kurt was doing no matter how hard she tried to downplay it. All of them urged her to tell him before it was too late.
"Even if it's not the reaction you expect, do you really want anything to happen to him without him knowing he had a second child?" Trae had argued, making a point that sat indifferently with Lindy. She knew he was thinking about their mother and how they had not known of the child she'd been carrying when she had passed.
As much as she didn't want to admit it, Trae was right. Even if Kurt flipped out over having brought another baby into the world, there was no way that Lindy wanted to live her whole life without having gotten the chance to share that kind of news with the man she loved.
But of course, the ultimate goal was that there be no worry of Kurt going anywhere.
Lindy spooned another a bite of Lucky Charms into her mouth and attempted to train her attention on a repeat episode of Rocko's Modern Life. She was doing her very best to enjoy what she had deemed as a cozy night in, but it was hard to do so knowing that Kurt was most likely up to no good.
She resisted calling. No matter how badly she wanted to ring him and beg for him to come over, an unspoken understanding had arisen between them that if Kurt simply wasn't with Lindy, he wouldn't be making his location known to her.
