LISA
It was time to go to school but before I go I left another paper plane on her doorstep. I do it every day. It's the only thing that makes me feel better since I can't talk to her.
About the handkerchief that I lost, it is still not found. I probably lost it when I sent a plane to Jennie's house. I just can't get over it because it's the only thing that reminds me of my grandma. She was one of the most important people in my life. She was the only person who was there during the times when I needed love and care.
My parents were too busy to care for me. I never even felt love for them. Whenever I fell and get wounded, God knows how much I wanted my mom to cure it for me. I want her to comfort me and tell me everything would gonna be fine. But she never did. It was all about their business. It was all about money. All they care about is wealth.
Even my dad, when I was a kid I want him to teach me how to ride a bike but he was always on his phone, talking to his clients. As a result, I never learned to ride a bike until now. At the table, I've always wanted us to eat a meal together decently but even there, it's all business they talk about. They're always busy in their own worlds.
They never even ask me how my first day at school went just like other parents do. They never ask me how I feel and I never felt that they love me. They love their business more than me, that's for sure.
But there was grandma, she always took care of me when my parents couldn't.
She always brushes my hair. She gives the warmest hugs. She was the light during my darkest days. She gave me laughter during times I couldn't even smile. She was the one who covered my ears when my parents threw harsh words at each other. She took care of me so well and provided the affection that was lacking in my life.
So when she passed away, I was so devastated. She was the only person who keeps me sane in the house but when she died, I felt like I don't belong to the house anymore. I felt like I was lost. That's how I decided to be independent. I traveled to Korea with my best friend Jisoo. She came with me since her brother lives here. Besides, she wanted to be with me too.
That's how I got here.
After I left the paper plane I left for school immediately. I don't wanna be caught after all.
At the class, I was just staring at the window the whole time. I don't have the guts to listen to what Miss Jung was talking about. It's too boring anyway. I was too drowned to my thoughts when someone poked my back. I looked back to see Sunmi.
"What?" I asked as I raised a brow. She sits behind me. She's actually nice but I think she's hitting on me.
"Are you busy after school?" she asked and smiled sweetly while still poking me but this time it's my shoulder.
Damn, it's annoying.
"No, why?" I still asked though I know where the conversation is going.
"Can you have a dinner with me later? Please," she pleaded while pouting. She's doing this for a while. I mean, inviting me to go out with her. I think I should just give her a chance but it's gonna be the first and last. I just want her to stop already.
"Fine," I said and sigh in defeat.
"Yey! Thank you so much," she almost jumped on joy. Seriously, what's the big deal? It's just dinner.
What she did made Miss Jung look at us. Sunmi then kept quiet, so did I because I don't wish to go out of the classroom earlier than I should. I just tried to focus on the discussion.
During the lunch time I went to the cafeteria because I was so damn hungry. It just sucks that I'm probably gonna eat alone this time since Jennie don't want to see me and Jisoo is gonna be with her. I have no choice anyway so I have to just suck it up. It's better that Jisoo is with Jennie than with me though because I know that she doesn't have other friends.
Speaking of them, I saw them as soon as I entered the cafeteria. They were already seated. They were chatting as they eat. There are times that I see Jennie laugh. Are they that happy without me?
To be honest, I missed how the three of us would eat together. When we played and bond together. They were my bestfriends but now we barely even talk, it really sucks.
I still talk to Jisoo sometimes though but to Jennie, I never tried. She would just ignore me anyway.
I saw Jennie looked at me but shifted her gaze immediately. I sighed and went to get my food. I just sat on the vacant table alone and ate silently. Why is it so hard to swallow? It's as if there's a big lump blocking my throat. I wonder if this is what Jennie used to feel before she made friends.
As continue eating, I didn't notice the hot liquid running down to my cheeks. It actually hurts. My heart hurts, it's so hard to breath. I hit my chest hard again and again and again until I heard a tray landed on the table, across me.
I wiped the tears and lifted my head to see who it was and I was shocked to see Pasta. She was frowning.
"W-what?" I asked with my forehead creased.
She wiped the tears left in my cheeks.
"You shouldn't be eating alone like this," she said and sat on the chair across me.
I haven't seen this girl for a while. I never saw her since the day I dumped her. I know I hurt her but it's better to hurt her with the truth than give her false hope. It would be harder for her in the end.
Pasta, I mean Rosé Park was my first friend here in this school other than Jisoo when I transferred.
She was so nice to me. She was so cute like a chipmunk and her voice was angelic which match to her personality. To be honest, I even liked her before but that was before Jennie came into picture.
I liked Nini even more. No, I think I even love her already. So when Pasta confessed that she likes me, I dumped her because my heart already belongs to someone else, someone who never noticed me.
She was probably broken that's why she didn't show up for the past few days. She must've avoided me.
I understand what she feels tho but I'm telling you, she already knew that I've been into Jennie for so long.
"Who made you cry?" she asked seriously.
"Nothing, I just looked away." It's none of her business anyway.
We started eating and we talked about the things that happen when she was away. We chatted and joke around. Actually, I kinda miss this girl. She made me smile today.
