imagines - s.m

☼ | Insecure

YOU GROANED SOFTLY. Shawn was underneath you, while you're snuggling into his chest, right on top of him.

You continue sleeping, tightened your hands around his neck, while Shawn-can't contain his smile as he was looking at you.

"God, you're so beautiful," He whisper while his hand stroking your hair. You're a heavy sleeper, so you can't hear what Shawn has been saying. You feel so comfortable in his arm, especially when it comes stroking your hair. You love it.

One thing that Shawn love to do is talking to you while you're asleep. That sounds weird, but he loves it. He talks everything that happens to him in the past or now, he doesn't care if you don't answer him.

One time you heard him talking to you while you're asleep, you smile through your sleep. He didn't notice. You started to investigate him every night and you noticed that he loves it when it comes to talk to you when you're asleep. You never complained because you love it too anyway.

Shawn's hand travel through your cheek, rubbing it softly. He observe your swollen eyes, "Poor baby."

You were crying last night because of your body-anxiety. Last night was supposed to be a party night in one of your friend's house, but you cancel the plan because you were so scared. Shawn was waiting for you in the outside of the bathroom. You were crying untill you left with none of your tears.
You were so scared with the dress. When you put on the dress, it was so tight that you can see your stomach's bun.

"I hate myself. Why did I have a body like this?" You said to yourself in front of the mirror, "Why?!"

You punched the mirror, it broke into a few pieces. Your right hand started to bleed. You washed your hand immediately.

Shawn heard the glass-breaking noise from the bathroom, he immediately knock on the door. Keep asking if you're okay in there.

"Honey? You're still in there?" Shawn knocked on the door, you panicly wipe the blood on your hand, then wipe your tears away from your cheek. You wash your face even though it won't help to cover your red eyes and nose.

"(y/n)? You in there?" He called you again, "Hey? Is everything all right?" Your heart thummed so fast, trying as hard as you can to make the blood stop running.

You decided to came to the door slowly, hesitately open the door, "(y/n)—"

Shawn saw your red eyes, "Your eyes are all red.. Have you been—"

You turned around so he won't talk about it, "No no no, don't turn around."

He grabbed your wrist softly making you face him. You tried your best not to make eye contact with him, "Hey... What happened?"

"Wait, there's red-ish mark on your cheek," He said as his finger tried to wipe it off from your cheek. You reflected, so you hold his hand so he won't touch your face. But you make the wrong move, you use your bleeding hand.

"(y/n), your hand!" He said panicly.

You can't hold it any longer, so you hugged him so tight then cry it all out, "Shh... Baby.. Hey, it's fine. I'm right here, okay?"

"Oh god, babe, you're quivering, calm down," He said as he rub your back gently,"Babe, I know you need tight hug right now, but we need to take care of your hand. Okay?"

He run his hand to the back of your right hand that wrapped in bandages, touching it lightly, "Gosh.. Babe."

"Don't ever do this again."

You slightly open your eyes, you woken up because Shawn's hand can't stop moving around your back. But you keep it quiet, so he won't notice that you hear him. You make sure if he was talking to you while you were asleep.

Shawn kissed the back of your covered-with-bandages hand, "My poor baby."

"I know you feel insecure in some times and circumstances, but I didn't know that it was.. this bad," He muttered grabbing your hand slowly and hold it gently, "I just.. I didn't expect someone that taught me love accept whoever you are can go through this."

"(y/n), you taught me how to be myself, how to accept myself. And it broke my heart when I know you go through this situation. Because you are the one who taught me everything about self-love and self-acceptance."

He kissed the back of your hand, you really want to hold him back, and tell him how much you love him, but you can't. Because you don't want him to stop talking to you. You're curious what he'll talk about to you.

You bit down your lips, he's talking to me again while I'm sleeping.

"You are beautiful in your own way, honey. And I don't think I need to tell you that with words. The whole world knows you're beautiful," He continues. Your body become warmer all the sudden because of his words.

Shawn tighten his wrap around yor waist, feeling his skin against yours, kissing your cheek a couple times, "No wonder why you're so warm,"

"Your beauty shine brighter than the sun," He said laughing lightly. You smiled vaguely, "So.. now.. let me tell you, that I love you for you. I don't need you to have model's body so I'll love you. I love your for you. Your body, your personality, everything about you."

"Every night, I tell you how much I love you. I don't care if you're asleep or not. I just.. want you to know."

He kiss your forehead, "I love you forever, baby. Remember that."

You pretend that you just woke up, groaned lightly then look at Shawn, "Baby," You called.

Shawn immediately pretend to sleep so you won't see suspicious thing he did while you're asleep. You smiled as you see Shawn closed his eyes. You know he's not asleep because of his breathing; a little heavy and panic.

"Hm?" He said pretending he was sleeping. You smirked then he opens his eyes.

"I love you," You said.

"Hm?" He chuckled, "You woke up just to tell me that you love me?" He ask.

"Y-Yea?" You answer but it sounds more like you ask back.

"God, I love you so much," He hugged you then push you softly so you now underneath him. You both were laughing.

"Damn. I'm so lucky to have a beautiful girl like you, (y/n)," He said then kissing all of your face, "Gahh! Shawn!" You screamed as you laughed.