Poems from a liar

Poems from a liar (troubles below my tears)

Maybe somewhere I'm happy but it hides from me. I remember when i was happy and then one day it all died and i turned into someone i didn't recognize.

Sometimes i wonder what would happen if i opened the door of sorrow and never opened it to come back.

I wouldn't coun't them as lovers or mates...well not any more at least. I really don't care if it hurts them. I'm sure they have an excuse for there mistakes or their pleasures in disguise.

I'm sure being anti-social is better then being a social butterfly. But you could be called a moth now of days then others.

Sometimes i wish i could just freeze time and go back to where it all started and tell my self to choose something else.

But, life isn't a game. Well to others i'm a toy which they play and fiddle with my mind and my emotions but to me..I just cant go back.

Sometimes the tears come that you just can't hold back. The ones that sting as it streams down my cheeks. The ones that mean something.

Sometimes when i have something to look forward to it always seems to go the worst of ways. It doesn't matter to me anymore. I lost everything a long time ago so being hurt is nothing.

It seems like the things that i never to I'm doing most to get away from it all. Just to get away from the screaming and the announce of others.

I don't know why i say things I'm going to do but never proceed.

 I should i could leave but there's always something to hold me back to keep me breathing.

I think of my self as a piece of a game that's worthy of importance, respect, and love but is never treated as such. Or maybe something else..

I feel like I'm slipping into a dark place. I'm sure it wouldn't be as bad as where i am now. Better then faking a smile. But that's the best make-up any one can wear is a smile.

I'm not angry or sad I'm just getting more  weak and now I'm broken. I'm okay with that. I care to much about people i should have no faith in.

If i had faith again.

I'm okay with the way the world works and how i will end up.Its better to explain to my self then no one at all even if its just  be in the end alone.

I wish someday i can look back and can't remember how i felt this way or what drove me to being the way i am now.

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