Stall

Chapter 9.

"I wanna be alone
Alone with you - does that make sense?
I wanna steal your soul
And hide you in my treasure chest"

**

Sometimes in life, instances happen that you can't explain. There's no rhyme or rational reason for them, and no matter how hard you try you can't figure out why you do the things you do.

The fact I'm standing outside Harry's front door at 1am is one of those instances.

It's been three weeks since the aquarium, and since then I've only been sucked deeper into this labrynth surrounding him, trying to figure out what I'm even doing there, and figuring out more and more each day it's probably something I won't escape.

I've gotten whiplash from his hot and cold behaviour, there's times I won't see or hear from him for days, then the next minute he's turning up at my work everyday ordering that same cup of ice.

I'm angry at myself that on the days he decides to appear out of no where that I get so giddy over it, that I relish those days like a pathetic puppy, hung on every word or look he gives me.

I never saw that same Harry again, that I saw at the aquarium. The soft and gentle side of him that seemed to shine through that day, he's gone straight back to being ambiguous and arrogant.

The worst part as, the fleeting glimpse I had of that side of him only further engraved him further into my veins, it left me desperate for another peek at part of him, pining for it like a heroine addict looking for their next fix.

It was like getting to look into a secret doorway, only to then have the door slammed on you, leaving you on the other side waiting hopelessly for it to open again.

Harry had fell off of the face of the earth again these last two days, until tonight that is.

I was woken up by a phone call, only to be snapped out of my hazy half asleep state by Harrys rough voice.

There was no hello, no formalities, just three simple words.

"I need you"

I had tried asking if everything was okay, asking what was going on or why he was calling me in the middle of the night.

But as usual questions with him rarely get answered, they were just dismissed with him repeating that he needed me, and telling me to come over.

A please here and there wouldn't kill the guy, geeze.

The thing that had me throwing on some clothes and rushing out of my front door was the tone of his voice.

He sounded desperate, almost lost.

There was a vulnerability there I never pictured leaving his mouth and it had me sick with worry.

I guess this is one time I'm grateful Andy and I don't live together, that he's committed to the decision that he thinks that we shouldn't live together until we're married.

He said several times his father was adamant about it, and he firmly held the same beliefs.

Doing otherwise would be an embarrassment to his family, and above all else, doing anything to tarnish his family's reputation is the cardinal rule you never break.

I know I'm flirting with disaster because tonight made me realise its no longer a fascination I have with Harry, it's not just some magnetic attraction, it's that I care about him.

It's probably one of the most masochistic things I could do, because he's made it very abundantly clear that his care for me is non existent. Which is a fact I still find to be an overwhelming headache because everything he does contradicts that.