The Setup » [lashton] √

1.9

Luke pressed the skip intro button on another episode of forensic files. He had been sure he'd be fine to go to work after he'd had a good cry, but this was his third day on the couch and, quite frankly, a waste of a perfectly good Saturday, he knew that. He'd started out excusing his days off work by doing housework, but there were only so many loads of laundry and so much stuff he could clear out of the fridge. So he'd ended up back on the couch several seasons deep in Forensic Files and a mostly empty bottle of Rosé by his side. He'd thrown the bottle of Sauv Ashton had brought in the bin out of spite. 

Which made him feel worse that he felt the need to do that in the first place; he couldn't even articulate why he was so angry at Ashton. It was so many things and nothing. He was tired, relieved it was over but so exhausted. He was starting to realise as well that all those months with Ashton had felt like being back in the closet again, and for what? He'd enjoyed the time they'd spent together but was it worth this.. this confusion?

He brought his wandering mind back to the television, watching and not watching it over the next few hours as invasive thoughts kept distracting him. Were Emma and Ashton back together by now? Did he miss him? There Friendship? Had he ever told anyone about them?

Each thought disturbed his show at different intervals, and then he'd train his eyes and his mind back on the gruesome murder before him. He honestly didn't know what had happened in most of the episodes, and he was starting to get fidgety. So when there was a knock at the door, he jumped up to get it without much thought, an excuse to distract himself. 

On the otherside stood Michael, and he sighed and stood aside to let him in.

He took a considering look over Luke, and the younger man might have felt ashamed on another day, but today, he rolled his eyes; Michael should be glad he was wearing underwear. 

"Ashton said I should come check on you, didn't tell me why, and quite frankly, I didn't expect this," he looked Luke up and down again for emphasis, "I'm assuming you two had some sort of fight? Was it about that guy you've been seeing? It doesn't matter; you guys need to get over it; you're such good friends. It's a waste to argue over some guy," 

A sob racked through Luke's chest, and he turned from Michael and returned to his spot on the couch. 

"I-" Michael began. 

"Don't worry, it's too much to explain," he sighed, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. 

Michael made his way to the couch, sitting precariously between pillows and blankets and Luke's now-empty wine bottle. "Would it be too much to explain to Calum?" he asked, placing a gentle hand on Luke's knee. He could tell Michael wanted to comfort him, but there was an awkwardness in the air; he was clearly aware there was something he didn't know about. Luke felt bad for making him feel as though he were an outsider but not enough to try and protect the other's feelings right now. 

He pulled out his phone and dialled a number quickly, "yeah, I'm at Luke's, mmm, Ashton sent me over to check on him, I don't know, yeah I'll stay until you get here," 

"I'm not a child; I can be left alone until Calum comes," Luke said stroppily, wiping at the last of the dampness on his cheeks. 

"It looks like you've had most of that bottle of wine," 

"So?"

"So, I think you might be a bit tipsy, and you're clearly upset. I'm your friend; even If you don't wanna tell me what the problem is, I'm gonna stay until I know you're okay," 

There was a long pause and Luke's self-pitying dissolved long enough for him to say, "thank you, I'm sorry," 

"It's okay," Michael said quietly, and so they sat in silence on the couch for the next half an hour, the TV providing an excuse not to speak until Calum arrived. Then Michael gave him his seat,  whispered something in his ear, and left. A different, less awkward silence filled the air. 

"When did you last shower," Calum asked, taking a long look over the pile of take out bags by the side table.

"I don't know, Wednesday," Luke shrugged, eyes trained on forensic files, determined to not give the other anything. 

"C'mon then," Calum stood and beckoned him with his hand; Luke sighed, determination quickly crumbling and getting up to follow him. He led him into the bathroom, "all right, clothes off,"

He let out another sigh, sliding his briefs down and then pulling his sweatshirt over his head and throwing it in the corner. When he turned back to the shower, he had a sense of deja vu come over him, watching as Calum adjusted the temperature. He tried to shake the feeling and moved past Calum into the shower, standing under the spray and letting the water wash over him, feeling a certain level of relief. 

"Wash your hair," Calum told him before turning to collect his clothes off the floor and put them in the basket. 

"I'm not washing my hair, I'll admit the waters refreshing, but I can't be bothered with that," he said, letting his eyes fall shut. 

He heard Calum groan, "you're so fuckin' moody when you're tipsy," so Luke's eyes flicked open, and he saw Calum stripping off, and then he was climbing in the shower behind him, "pass me the shampoo," Luke reached his arm backward and passed the shampoo to him, and Calum started to wash his hair quietly. "So, did you tell him?"

"No," he said quietly, "it's way more complicated than that," he waited, thinking Calum would have more questions, but instead, he just kept massaging the shampoo into his scalp. "About a week after I found out that you'd lied to me, we ran into Emma at a thrift store with some guy.  Ashton was upset, I brought him back here and tried to make him laugh, you know I just wanted him to feel better, and then I-I kissed him," He felt the blood rush up his neck, his voice failing him for a moment. "He kissed me back, which I know is stupid, but he wanted me, and I- I really fucking wanted him,"

Calum was quiet and then asked very gently, "you let it go further, didn't you?"

Luke let out a sad laugh, feeling the tears welling in his eyes again, "Yeah, yeah, I did. We had sex, and then he called out her name, and I was kind of hurt, but like I wasn't surprised, I knew he was still in love with her, and I-"

"You kept letting it happen... He's the one you've been sleeping with, isn't he?" the way he spoke suggested the realisation was coming to him as the words were leaving his lips. Luke nodded, assuming Calum could tell from behind, seeing as he still had his fingers knotted in Luke's hair. "What changed then? Are you in love with him?" he could hear that Calum was trying to be gentle and understanding, but there was a hint of worry under it all. 

"On Wednesday, we were.... fucking, and his phone started ringing. It was Emma, and Michael had said something in passing about them getting back together a few days ago. I hadn't thought anything of it. We'd been lying to you guys so much about where we going and who we were meeting that I thought he was just making an excuse. But then she was calling him and, and I- I had this terrible feeling.  So I was like, 'oh, Emma's calling', and he's like 'it'll be nothing, just decline it', but then I couldn't stay like that, so I made him pull out, and he kept talking, and I was trying to think, and he was like, 'has this really killed the mood', and then I started crying and I asked him 'you're getting back together with her aren't you?' and he didn't say anything and I got so mad, and I was upset and embarrassed. Then finally he goes 'I was going to tell you', and I told him to get out and- and I just cried and cried once he left, he had nothing to say in his defence, just 'I was going to tell you'. Like he should have ended things with me if he knew he was getting back with her, right? That's not fair to her, and- and it's-"

"It's not fair to you either," Calum said firmly, knowing Luke didn't have any confidence in the assertion. 

"I- I didn't think we were dating, or in love or any stupid shit like that, but I thought he was my friend, and he made me feel like an idiot," 

Calum turned Luke in his arms and pulled him close, "you're right, you don't treat people like that," he said simply, and Luke only felt the tiniest bit better. He was only halfway to having clean hair and some reassurance, but that was better than an hour ago.