There were Six (Six of Crows one-shots)

Pickles

Jesper: KAZ! HOW DO YOU NOT LIKE PICKLES!?
Kaz: Jesper, why in Ghezen's name are you screaming to me about my food preferences.
Jesper: BECAUSE PICKLES!!!
Kaz: Do you realize that your Merchling doesn't like those abominations as well?
Jesper: BUT KAZ, PICKLES!
*Proceeds to pull out a jar of pickles
Kaz: Do you often carry around a jar of pickles with you?
Jesper: IN SITUATIONS LIKE THESE, IT IS NECESSARY!
Kaz: ...I don't find how pickles are going to change anything.
Jesper: I WILL BEAT YOU OVER THE HEAD WITH THESE UNTIL YOUR PREFERENCE CHANGES!
Kaz: Keep it down, Jesper, the entire East Stave can hear you screaming about pickles.
Jesper: KAZ BREKKER I WILL MURDER YOU WITH THIS JAR OF PICKLES!
Kaz: I find you much more pleasant when you are not waving a jar of pickles at my face.
Jesper: KAZ YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!!! HOW CAN YOU HATE PICKLES!?!?
Kaz: I simply find them unpleasant.
Jesper: KAZ I'M ACTUALLY GOING TO KILL YOU!
Kaz: You are speaking to the man who managed to beat you half to death with no cane.
Jesper: YES KAZ BUT I HAVE PICKLES.
Kaz: And are those pickles going to help you when you're lying on the ground, bleeding?
Jesper: ...
Jesper: Kaz, why did you actually continue speaking to me about pickles.
Kaz: ...
Kaz: Perhaps I found some amusement out of it.
Jesper: Look at that, pickles have managed to change Kaz Brekker. They gave him a sense of humour.
Kaz: Has it occurred to you that it was simply because your jokes weren't very good?
Jesper: Nope, definitely the pickles.
Jesper: Wait, hold on.
Jesper: So this joke was good????
Jesper: Who are you and what have you done with the Bastard of the Barrel.
Kaz: ...
Kaz: Jesper, you're making a scene.
Jesper: Hey, hey. We are making a scene.
Kaz: Well then, we should probably stop.
Jesper: But did I manage to change your preferences?
Kaz: No.