there's no way | seaycee (sean and kaycee)

09

"...so we could just give in to what we want"
(sorry for any typo and things like that, I haven't revised the chapter yet)

She didn't try to talk with him again during the whole week, even though she missed him as if he was the air she couldn't breathe. She was upset from what she saw when she tried to, he had Jenna at his house a day after they fought, and seeing that really broke her.

After that moment she thought that it couldn't get worse, but how naive could she be? It got worse day after day of the week. He was back into the party life, going out every night, always having a different girl by his side, just like it happened when they quit being friends years ago — the difference was that this time he was eighteen, and his style of partying has grown up with him.

She tried to pretend not to notice the dark circles around his eyes whenever they had classes together, how he would sometimes fall asleep in the corner of a class, how he always looked as tired as someone that spent the whole night partying. She tried to hold back her desire to take care of him.

She tried to pretend not to notice how he would always leave the classes with some girl in his arms. The arms that belonged to her, the arms she belonged to, and that now was embracing a different random girl every night.

And the worse was that she knew he didn't want them, she knew she was the one he was trying to find in all of those girls and yet she didn't know how to make him be with her instead. The worse was that he was trying to forget her right in front of her eyes, it was like watching the who you like leaving you over and over and over again, sitting right in the front row without being able to move.

The worse was that she knew she put him there, she hurt him and that was why he was trying to forget her so badly — she didn't want to blame herself for him acting like a douchbag and a fuckboy, and yet she kind of did.

She couldn't pretend she didn't attempt some of those defense mechanisms too as a way to try to forget his years ago, she was just more discreet them him. She went on some dates, hooked up with some guys but nothing important, serious, or that solve the problem. Even when she didn't see it, it was still him the one she searched in everyone.

The whole week was the worst for both of them as they waited for Friday to come, for different reasons that at the end of the day were kind of the same: she couldn't stop worrying if he was going to be there as she told him to and he couldn't make his mind if he was going to go or not.

He was certain that it was one the greatest opportunities a dancer or choreographer could get but Tessandra and unity wanted him and Kaycee, and he wasn't sure if they would still be the same while dancing as the ones she watched in a video some time ago. He was unsure if they would still be able to connect at the level they did before — hell to that, he wasn't sure if he would even be able to touch and be that close to her without his heart-shattering into million pieces.

It has only been a few weeks, maybe a month or so since they danced together for the first time in that Jojo's class and yet it felt like it was years ago, considering everything that happened and how things went higher than the clouds to as low as the bottom of the ocean pretty quickly.

That Friday morning she got there earlier than intended, she was certain that he wouldn't go so when went with an apologetic speech ready so she could apologize with Tessandra for the whole mess.

But to her surprise, when she walked into the studio there he was, staring at himself in the mirror as he stretched his muscles — he caught her eyes through the reflection as she was still standing by the door, confused to be seeing him but also relieved.

He took a deep breath, getting his eyes away from her. During the week it was easier for him to pretend she wasn't there in classes because of how many people there were in it, he just always had to leave before she had any solo because he couldn't bear the idea of seeing her dancing.