Stuck On You

May 23, 2014

“Hey, Anna!” Michael pounded his fist against the door. “Annaaaaaa!”

I glance across the couch, giving Luke an apologetic stare before standing to go to the door. I brush nonexistent dust off of my pants, gradually making my way to the door. I unlock it, holding it open just far enough to poke my head through.

“Hey, what’s up?” I question, trying to block Michael’s view into my apartment.

“You said we could hang out,” Michael pouts, pushing past me automatically.

I don’t even attempt to stop him, knowing this would have happened eventually. Michael meets Luke’s gaze and it’s like they are both having déjà vu.  

Luke stands suddenly. “What is this bastard doing in your house?” He shouts; pointing an accusing finger in Michael’s direction.

I had never heard Luke yell before, and I knew he barely swore. The effect Michael’s presence had on him was unnerving.

“I’m the bastard?” Michael stepped forward. “I’m not the one who started screaming at a random guy in the bar! I wasn’t doing anything!”

Luke’s face contorts momentarily, as if his comeback was faltered by something Michael had said. I choose this moment to step in. I didn’t know quite what to do, so I jumped right to the thing that would have normally happened.

“Michael, meet a friend of mine, Luke. Luke, meet my neighbor, Michael.” After stating the introduction, I step back, ready to jump out of the brawl.

“This is the guy you went out with yesterday?” Michael points to him, facing me.

I nod. “We knew each other when I lived in London-“

“He tried to smash my fucking brains in!” Michael yells.

He takes a step closer to me. Luke does the same. I feel like each of them is going to grab an arm and start tugging. I step back again, putting both of my hands in the air.

“Explain what is going on.” I motion for both of them to sit on the couch. They sit on opposite sides, snarling at each other.

“This asshole,” Michael begins. “Came up to me at the bar, I was just sitting there, talking to the bartender, and he started screaming at me and beat the shit out of me.”

Luke grinned, proud of himself, “I’d say I did I pretty good job.”

Michael moves as if he was going to hit Luke. I hold back his arm, leaning down in front of him. “Alright, well… Luke, why the hell did you start screaming at him?”

Luke gets comfortable on the couch before beginning. I probably shouldn’t mention to him that Michael and I had practically had sex in that spot. I have to bit my lip as not to smile. This is not the time or place.

“He started talking shit about you.”

Michael sits there, wide eyed, shaking his head. Luke rolls him eyes. “Don’t even try to deny it; you were sitting there telling the bartender how much you wanted to bang her. Don’t you have any respect? Jesus Christ.” Luke shakes his head.

My face furrows. I don’t know whether to be embarrassed for him or me. I don’t know if I should feel ashamed or in awe of him wanting to have sex with me again. I look to Michael, hoping he can provide some sort of explanation.

He doesn’t; as much in shock as I am at first. “I was pissed drunk.”

“And that gives you an excuse?” Luke scoffs. “I don’t go around telling random strangers how much I want to bang Anna-“He coughs, trying to pretend he didn’t admit to wanting to have sex with me as well. “Do you know what kind of impression that gives people?”