Stuck On You

April 4, 2015

“I never thanked you for that song.”

My head snaps around. “Huh?”

Michael cocks his head, trying to make my memory jog. “That song you wrote me.”

It’s my turn to cock my head. “I never said I wrote it for you.” The phrase is followed by a smile, allowing the sarcasm to remain in a joking manner.

“They who did you write it for? Calum?” He leans his head back, laughing.

“What if I did?” My shoulders shrug up and down.

Michael thinks on this for a second. “Then we should still be mad at each other.”

“Well…” I look away, trying to make him speculate that I was still mad. His eyes widen a bit in surprise before I laugh. “No, you know I can’t resist you.”

His eyebrows wiggle. “How could someone resist all of this?”

My laughter must be contagious, as Michael giggles in the booth across from me. A few parties around us even glance over, attempting to decipher what could have been so hilarious.

We sigh simultaneously. This is the first time in a long time we have spent a good amount of time together. With Michael planning out his tour and working on another album things have been difficult to gather back together. I had been spending more time with myself and Calum. Both of us seemed so incredibly busy we barely spoke on the walk home anymore.

When we did have time to spend together, like the walk home, we only had enough time to update the other on the insignificant daily activities. We hadn’t been able to enjoy each other’s company in nearly a month. Michael had suggested dinner, he thought we deserved to have a night off.

It was nice to have a night with Michael again. Even if it wasn’t our usual movie marathon while criticizing the ridiculousness of it, it was still enjoyable. Michael had informed me of every detail he had retained from all the tour planning. Whereas I informed him of all the new music I had been working with.

The tour wasn’t supposed to kick off for another few months, most likely about July. The idea of Michael being across the globe from me made me ache, even though I didn’t have the time to miss him yet. He already planned out dates he was going to fly me out, updating me on what my schedule would look like.

My life seemed dull in comparison to his. My time was being spent writing song after song. A few books were started here and there, never seeming to be finished. Calum was my main source of entertainment. He didn’t seem to mind my constant need for his company, he knew I didn’t have anyone else at the moment. As far as I knew he enjoyed my company.

“Anna?”

My gaze drifts back to Michael after I realize I’d been staring off into space. “Yea?”

“You alright?” His eyebrows stitch together; lips forming a tight line.

I bob my head up and down. “Yea, I’m just going to miss you.”

“Awwwww,” Michael takes my hand across the table. “You’re too cute.”

I stick my tongue out at him. “You’re a weirdo.”

“But you love me anyway,” Michael spreads a grin across his cheeks.

I scrunch my nose up, shrugging a bit. “Only sometimes”

Michael’s mouth drops open. “You’re so mean to me!”

Another shrug comes over me. “And yet you still love me…” I flick hair over my shoulder, I watch the gleam in Michael’s eyes.

There is a silence as we both pick at our food. It’s the comfortable silence I’ve missed. It was the same as when we watched movies or when we woke up next to each other in bed after a late night. It was the silence we shared at three am or when he watched me dance around my apartment to one of his songs. It wasn’t even silence; it was filled with breathing, it was filled with each other.

“Anna,” Michael begins, his smile lowering. “There’s something I have to tell you.”

Immediately my anxiety sets in, but I try to mask it. A knot forms in my stomach and my voice sounds hoarse. “What’s up?”

“I’ve been meaning to tell you,” He breathes, staring at his hands in his lap.

He takes a minute, trying to gather his thoughts. I interject, “It’s alright, Michael, you know you can tell me anything. If you don’t want to tell me now it’s okay.”

“No, I should tell you now.” He takes another breath, an unsymmetrical, tight lipped grin pressing at his cheeks. “I’ve met someone.”

Without permission, my eyes widen in surprise. I attempt to hide the fact, blinking a few times and furrowing my eyebrows together. “Wow, Michael.”

My emotions blend, creating the most disgusting mix of hatred, fear and confusion. “That’s great!”

The tone I exaggerate sounds incredibly fake. I want to puke at the sound of my own voice.

“I really like her...” He trails off, smiling at his hands.

I want to puke. That’s really why he hasn’t had time to hang out. He has been spending time with someone else. How much time has he been spending with her? Has she replaced me?

“What’s her name?” I choke out, nearly collapsing a lung.

“Sarah, I really want you to meet her.”