Night shift - Completed

Chapter 25

Poppy's PoV

The third floor terrace was my place to go when I really needed to clear my head. I could look out, day or night, across the city and to the people going about their daily business with no idea that in that moment I was watching them. It really got my mind working, distracting me from the thoughts in my head that had made me come out here. I was just so confused. There were many things about this shift that were abnormal to my usual ones, but this one really was getting to me; the pressure of looking after a major celebrity under the watchful eye of his band mates and his guards, paparazzi wanting to question me at all times of day and night even when emergencies were taking place, Calum going downhill whilst in my care... it was just a lot for me. Things hadn't exactly gone wrong, but they hadn't gone to plan and that was enough to mean I needed to take a break and get some air.

"Hey Poppy." A male voice called from behind me, pulling me from my thoughts. I turned my head to look in the direction the voice came from, but kept my body facing where it was.

"Ashton?" I had to double check. It was pretty dark out here and not many people knew this part was here, other than the staff. I squinted towards the dark figure who continued to take steps towards me.

"Yeah. Look, sorry to bother you. Mavis told me where I could find you." He finally came into view with the glow from the lights projecting over the terrace.

"Well I should shout at her for breaching my confidentiality but I have a feeling she told you for a reason." Ashton stood beside me, mimicking my body as he placed his arms on the barrier and looked out over the city.

"We said we were worried about you. Calum said you hadn't eaten or drunk all day and I noticed you were pretty drained from when Calum had gone downhill... we just wanted to check you were okay." Ashton didn't look at me, but carried on taking in the city, just like I was doing. For a moment, a comfortable silence breezed between us like the gusts of wind that were giving a slight chill to the air. I brought my arms up and wrapped them round me.

"I'm fine. Thank you though." I lied, not knowing whether there was any point in putting my stresses on him when they'd probably forget me as soon as they got back to their real lives. Ashton let out a disappointed sigh before turning his head to me for the first time since he'd come out here.

"Mavis told us you only come out here and take breaks like this when something has upset you." Ashton added, knowing it could possibly upset me more to know Mavis was disclosing things about me to anyone and everyone. A less comfortable silence fell as I tried to work out what to say, knowing I was being backed into a corner.

"It's just been stressful. The paps watching every move I make, recording me in the bathroom, the pressure when Calum got worse having his guards staring at me as I worked... I don't know, it's just been different." Ashton nodded along with everything I said, making it feel more worthwhile that I was venting and he was actually listening. "And Calum." I added quickly, knowing it was probably too much to say but I couldn't help it. He had been half the reason I was out here.

"But you worked so well on him. You've nursed him back to health. You've got nothing to be upset about when it comes to Calum." Ashton said supportively like he was giving me the pep talk I needed. I smiled as I took in how much he'd seen of me working and that he appreciated it. Unfortunately I wasn't talking about that.

"Thank you." I began. "But the health side wasn't the bit I was talking about. I mean him and his feelings..." Ashton's expression changed as I said it and he turned his body towards me, showing he was eager to listen and learn. He gestured for me to continue. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to offload this onto you..." I said before I even started. "He apologised to me, which was great, and I really thought we were going to go back to how we were before; friendly and sociable, but since he apologised he's been spending all his time trying to convince me I'd be better off not knowing him or trying to stay in contact, not even as a friend! He keeps on about the paps and the lifestyle and how every girl he's been with has hated it or given up on him before it started. I don't really know how I'm meant to carry on with him like this. I thought there was a spark there but I guess it was only on one side." I shrugged, turning myself back to look over the city. I could hear Ashton sigh disheartened at what I'd said but didn't know if it was because he knew Calum had been wrong or because he was about to deliver me some bad news. Holding my feelings in, I waited for him to speak.

"Calum..." he trailed of from the start, wondering how to word what he was going to say. "He's a fantastic guy but he keeps his walls up. He's seen us all get hurt, he's been hurt before, he thinks love is a sham - so he doesn't try it. He turns people off of him by the way he acts just so he isn't hurt later on when his feelings have grown. He's an idiot but he's trying to keep himself safe." His words hit like icy slaps on my cold cheeks. They woke me up not only to seeing his point of view but seeing where I'd been going wrong. "I've known him a long time and honestly, you're the closest I've seen him get to showing his feelings towards someone. I know it's hard because he doesn't retaliate at first but keep going, his walls are crumbling." A small smile grew on the corners of my lips, indicating that I was happy with Ashton's answer. Calum did like me back, but he was going to have a hard time showing it. All I needed to do was prove it to him and make him see he'd be a fool to miss out.