Look Me In The Eye When I Tell You I Love You

Confrontation

MJAM: I said I would update by Friday and look! it's Friday and here's a update. Eternally awesome!!! The video on the right is kinda freaky but I like the beat. It's dubstep called Bangarang by Skrillex.

Ian

Two weeks, it had been almost two weeks and she still wouldn't talk to me.

There are times when I thought that she'd just forget about her anger, that we'll be talking again, that everything will go back to normal, but then she'd walk away without a word whenever I gaurd her from Eric. It was killing me inside, having her hate me like this. I could only watch her as she continued to give me the cold shoulder.

I still kept my eye on her, guarding her as I was supposed to, following her and Deix as she went home, watching her house at night even though Deix was there, I still fulfilled my duty as her personal guard. Atleast, that's what I told myself, but, everytime I watched her, my drifted from my duty and to my fantasies of her with me. Not with Deix.

Two more days and then it'll be the weekend, I thought as I struggled to pay attention in French, my last period. Demie sat next to me, her head bent over her notebook as she copied the french conjugations from the board. I knew that she knew I was watching her, I was always watching her, but her hand never wavered. I glanced at the clock, five more minutes until school was out.

Five more minutes to go until I could talk to her. Deix would be busy this afternoon, addressing the Court of Ahln alongside his father. He wouldn't be here to drive her home. To remind me that she could never be mine. A fact that I'm choosing to ignore in just a few more minutes.

I clicked my pen, impatient, half-watching the clock and half-watching Demie. Her jaw clenched, an annoyed look making its way onto her face, obviously annoyed by the clicking noise. I stopped, not wanting her to be annoyed with me.

Though she wouldn't talk to me and she was still angry with me, I could tell that she didn't hate me and that she still loved me. I knew she was just being stubborn. She didn't want to admit that she was wrong, or that she missed me, or that she wanted things to go back to normal. She didn't want to admit it, so I guess I would have to.

The bell finally rang and the class hurried to pack up and get out of there as Monsieur Thomas reminded us of homework assignments due the next day. I was one of the first out of the door and I stepped off to the side, waiting for Demie to leave the classroom. As soon as she did, I grabbed her hand and pulled her down the hallway, ignoring her protests as I did.

"What the hell, Ian?" She glared at me once we reached the empty greenhouse up on the school roof. "I told you to say-"

"I'm sorry!" I blurted out, interrupting whatever she had been saying. "Okay, Demie? I'm sorry for lying to you, and hurting you, and being an ass."

She stared back at me, her eyes unreadable. We were close enough that a half-step forward, bending down a little, would bring my lips in contact with hers. I cast the thought into my pile of fantasies in the back of my mind and tried to focus.

Taking her silence as a cue to keep going, I continued, "I'm sorry, you shouldn've known about all of this a long time ago. I shoyld've tried to convince your father to let me tell you. I should've done something." Her face was still expressions, giving away nothing.

"Even if you don't believe me," I kept talking, determined to get her to understand, "or you just never talk to me again after this, I want you to know that I was never pretending any of it. I wasn't your friend because it was my job, I was your friend because I wanted to be... and I still want to be. So, yeah... that's all."

"You're done?" Her voice was just as emotionless as her features.

"yeah," I replied, stuffing my hands intomy pockets.