Diary of A Gay Black Teen (boyxboy)

I Care

As I wobbled on my crutches, I pulled out the phone I stole back from Jay when I was packing my stuff. As soon as I got outside I called Chris constantly. When he finally answered I went off on him. “Yo a** don't never answer the d**n phone, I could be dead depending on yo a**.” “First of All, do you know how late it is.” “And if I'm calling you it must be important right.” “What the h**l you want.” “I need you to come and pick me up.” “Where you a** at?” Chris asked worried. “I'm on a street called...hold up.” I put him on hold so I could look at the street name. “Maklain.” I added. “Ain’t that street somewhere near yo house.” “Yeah some like that.” “Then why you cant walk home.” “Long story just come and get me.” “Give me sometime I'm on my way.” “Alright.” I hung up the phone as I stood outside waiting on Chris.

(15 mins later)

I was mad as h**l. He did not live that d**n far. I called him but as usual he didn't answer. The mosquitoes was biting the s**t out of me. I felt Jay behind me so I rushed to put the phone away. “Come back in the house and I'm not taking no for an answer.” “Jay gone bout yo business.” I said waving him off. “You are my business now come on.” Jay said pulling on me and I fell on my a** pulling away from him. I didn't want s**t from him including the hand he reached out to help me get up. But knowing I couldn't get up without it, I had no choice but to grab hold. “I'm sorry.” “For what?” I said with an attitude. “For making you feel like I don't give a f**k about yo feelings when I do.” I said nothing as I looked away hoping Chris would turn up.

“Don't do that.” Jay said pulling on me once again. I was so over Jay. It ain't nothing he could possibly do or say to make me want him or believe all the s**t he lie about. “I can't lose you.” He said in my ear while standing behind me wrapping his arms around my waist. The phone vibrated in my pocket. I broke lose from Jay “Whats that.” He asked. “Nothing!” “I stated as I saw Chris driving slowly down the street. I waved my hand as he passed the house. “Who is that.” My ride I was about to say until Jakayla called Jay. He stayed there thinking I was gone follow. As soon as he left I rushed to Chris car. I didn't have time to put my crutches on the back seat, I just hopped inside.

“Who house is this?” “Jay's PULL OFF before he come out and make a scene.” “You lying, why you not at home?” “My mama kicked me out for knocking out Trevon with my crutch.” “She kicked him out too.” “ She better have.” “And how you get over here.” “I walked, I tried to call yo a** but you NEVERRR... Answer the d**n phone.” “Hold up now, if I would of never answered the phone yo a** would of still been over here, why you didn't stay any way.” I told Chris what happened.

“D**n why u didn't beat his a**, I told you he was no good.” “Say that again.” “While y'all was about to f**k.” “Yeahhh... and don't go running yo mouth telling the whole f*****g world my  business. “I didn't even mean too tell Tony that, it slipped out.” “Well this better not slip nowhere.” “Okay Treee...” “Shutup.”

(Two days later)

I'm still staying with Chris and his mama, she love that I'm over here, I wish my mama was like her. She let Chris smoke, drink, let his nigga spend the night. He basically grown in her eyes meaning I am too, I could get use to this. I haven't been nowhere near the house. Monday we didn't have school so Chris wanted to go out to some party. He begged me to go but I didn't have s**t to wear out so I said No. “Come on let's run to yo house, right quick.” “No my mama probably there.” “With or without you I'm going.” “Go ahead with yo Bad A**. Chris waited at the door for me to follow. “You must thought that was gone change my mind.” I said knowing he did. “Come on.” Chris begged. “Noo" I yelled and  Chris walked out the door. I looked out the window as he pulled off. I went and sat on the porch knowing he wasn't really going nowhere. I played on the phone until a horn grabbed my attention. I walked to the car.

“I knew yo shaky a** wasn't going nowhere.” “Come On”  Chris begged. I got in the car and as soon as we pulled up to my house my whole attitude changed. Trevon was sitting outside doing the usual, smoking. “But she put him out though.” I was so mad I started crying. “Calm Down.” Chris said after noticing me shaking. Trevon got up and went to his girlfriend car. As soon as he got in I got out. “You ain't waisting no time.” Chris said following me inside. I opened the door with my key and rushed upstairs to grab all my s**t. At first I didn't want to make it obvious I been here but f**k that she letting this nigga stay here even though I didn't really give a f**k about coming back, the fact that she picking sides just pissed me off. Chris grabbed most of my things and hurried back to the car.

I heard Chris loud a** feet coming up the stairs. “We got company.” He said out of breath. “WHO" I said as my heart start beating fast as h**l. “Yo sisters.” “All of them.” “Yep” “Come on let's go.” We grabbed the last of my things that we could carry and walked down the stairs. “Tre" One by one my sisters crowded over me trying to give me a hug. They act they really missed me. “I love yall too but I gotta go.” I said breaking away from my sisters and walking outside. But All of a sudden I wish I didn't. Trevon stood with a gun pointed to my head. Chris and Trevon girlfriend was on the ground, my sisters were screaming like they was dying, and for the first time in my life I was calm. For the first time I ran out of tears to cry. I didn't give a f**k no more. “Shoot me.” I dared Trevon to do while everyone screamed No. He looked so f*****g evil. If I died today at least I would finally be free from all the drama, free from getting my a** beat cause a nigga don't accept me, free from worrying about niggas playing me. F**K LIFE. “Shoot me nigga.” I said while walking even closer. Camry grabbed my leg, crying like she was about to die. “Yo faggot a** dead.” He said pulling the trigger back.

I closed my eyes, I heard the gun sound loud in my ear but I didn't feel the s**t. Chris got up running to my side. Trevon laid on the ground lifeless. My body was in shock. I never saw a dead body. Blood stain covered the concrete. My mama pulled up and ran on the porch aiming straight for me after noticing that this time he wasn't just unconscious. She yanked on my shirt yelling “What you do?” The twins grabbed her and she walked over by Trevon and fell to the ground crying while holding his hand. Why I always gotta be the suspect, I'm the f*****g victim. I don't even know what happened. Did he kill his self? I wondered.

Shortly the police arrived. I couldn't even speak when they asked me questions, I was still in shock. The twins told them every thing that happened while I stood speechless by Chris. I didn't care for Trevon but seeing him like that made me feel some type of way. H**l seeing anybody would. “Take him to the f*****g hospital.” My mama yelled ignoring the fact that the men standing before her kept saying he was gone. “You did this.” She ran back to me catching me off guard, popping me hard as h**l. A policemen grabbed her and she tried her best to get out of his hold. This was too Much for me

A tear finally fell from my face. She act like I killed him.

After placing Trevon's body in a body bag, I'm not gone lie I was kind of relieved cause that would of been me. “What happened?” I finally asked Chris cause they were not letting us go. “Somebody shot him.” Mya said crying “Who" I said eager to find out. “We don't know they was in a black car.” “Hold up, they who." “We don't know.” The twins said. My phone start vibrating but I ignored it but It started again and when I attempted to turn it off I couldn't help but read the message that popped up on the screen.

Jay: I Told You I CARE!

What. I thought to myself but after taking a good look around I realized just what he Meant.

My mouth dropped I was in shock once again.

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