Broken Promises (#4 in the 'Outcast' series)

Chapter 30

Chapter 30:

"You been out here the whole time?"

I looked up as Matt sat down next to me. I just looked away and took a drag on the cigarette I had. Matt watched me for a bit before he spoke again.

"Look, I know you don't wanna talk 'bout whatever's on your mind, and I just wantcha to know I'm not gonna ask," he began as I just looked down. "Your friends just wanna know you're ok; that's why they ask."

I didn't respond for a few seconds.

"Shouldn't you be in class?" I asked quietly.

"Shouldn't you?" Matt asked back seriously.

I just shrugged. "Not like I'm missing anything. I couldn't do maths to save my fucking life."

Matt just stayed quiet and I looked at him. He was looking ahead of himself, clearly something on his mind as well.

"Why're you out here with me Matt?" I asked seriously, making him switch his gaze to me. "Didn't think you'd care enough 'bout my problems to come talk."

"I told you; not here to talk 'bout your problems," he said. "I know for a fact that Ashley'd be the only one to come talk to you, but he knows you don't wanna talk to him. He thinks he's done something to piss you off."

I shook my head. "He hasn't done anything. He shouldn't have to put up with me. I don't know why he does."

"'Cause you're his friend," Matt said as I looked down again and took a drag on the cigarette.

"I dunno why," I said as a few tears threatened. "He's put up with enough of my problems. He shouldn't've had to be dragged into any of this."

Matt sighed.

"Look, if Ashley didn't wanna be your friend, you'd know," he said. "He stands by his friends no matter what they're going through. You're a good enough friend that he didn't let anyone or anything stop him from getting down to California when you weren't well. If that's not a good friend, I dunno what is."

I just stayed silent and so he continued.

"You just need to realise that you've got people here for you when shit happens; people who actually give a fuck, even if you can't see it yourself. They're all concerned about you and can all see that somethin's not right. You don't have to talk about it; just don't lie to them. It breaks down that trust."

I just shrugged. Matt certainly seemed to know what he was talking about. I didn't really know much about him, but it certainly sounded like he knew what he was saying.

"Juliet told me 'bout what's happened with you two," he continued; of course she had. "I'd love to try and help, but I can't leave the house for a good while yet. Just make sure, whatever you do, get your point across to her dad. I had a hell of a time trying to earn his acceptance, but once he sees you're for real, he'll understand. He's just protective of his daughter."

"I think I'm more concerned 'bout my dad to be honest," I said quietly as I kept my gaze down. "He's gonna make sure I don't get the chance to fix this. He was the one that went ahead and made the call, and now look. I can't do anything 'bout it."

"You can change his mind; just make sure you get your point across and don't let him argue back," Matt said. "I know it might seem hard, but he has to realise he doesn't control whatcha do with your life. It's not him who has to live with it every day, is it?"

"Easy for you though," I said, looking at him. "You're naturally able to talk back to people; I can't. I can't even stand up for myself Matt. How am I meant to try and get my point across to my dad and Juliet's? I can't."