All Grown Up (COMPLETED)

19

Brielle Grace Bishop:

I jumped up in full attack mode once I heard my room door opened, I had just fell asleep it was hard for me to sleep without Za. "Sorry princess I was just checking on you." Kehlani said in a soft tone, her and my dad been extra over protective and my mom just holds me, it's like she understands she says no words we don't talk about it she just holds me.

"You scared me ma." I mumbled running my fingers through my hair, she sat at the corner of my bed and let out a deep sigh.

"I know we ain't talked about what happened to you, but I just want you to know this is so hard for me. I feel like I failed you and your mother by letting this bad thing happen to you. I know I'm not your biological parent but I love you unconditionally you're my heart Brielle, you're my daughter, blood couldn't bring us any closer, and I really took an L with this one. They're all dead but I'm still angry, I just want you to know that I'm sorry." Her head hanging low as tears fell from her eyes.

"I don't wanna talk about it because how do you wrap your mind around 7 guys having their way with you?" I was still trying to understand what I had did to deserve that? Maybe I was too strict and crazy, but why punish me for protecting my own heart? If a nigga can't handle my mouth, then they can't handle my pussy and for my thinking like that I was punished.

"You don't." My mom said coming into my room. She took a deep breath shaking her head. "You surround yourself with love because if you don't? That empty feeling will win." She sat next to Kehlani wrapping her arms around her. "Stop crying boo."

"No look Brielle I swear I love you and you are beautiful and what they did was not your fault at all you are perfect baby girl." Kehlani said turning and looking at me, I was fucked up by this but I wasn't about to show any signs of weakness I can't let them win like that. I couldn't let them have this mental control over me because they took something from me I could never get back.

I'm okay

Something bad just happened to me, but it isn't the end of the world.

You're okay Brielle.

I would coach myself every time I felt like dropping a tear, or thinking about it so much I feel myself slipping into depression. I couldn't let myself fall because if I didn't fight for me how could anyone else? I had to keep my head high like the warrior my parents raised me to be. "You are so strong." My mom said to me, she looked me in my eyes. She wasn't crying and she didn't have this look of sympathy, "We not letting them keep you down, understood?" I nodded. "You my daughter and I don't care how many people kick you while you down you stand tall it could always be worse, okay?" I nodded again feeling a lump form in my throat. "I love you Brielle and Kehlani does too, but you gotta continue to love yourself, I know it ain't easy it's a mental thing but baby I raised you to be stronger mentally, I raised you to be the way you are for a reason and whoever don't like it can come see me. You will not be a punching bag, you will not be a cum rag, you will not feel sorry for yourself, you are a boss and bad shit happens to bosses all the time they gone keep tryina knock you down, you are successful by association, the world hates a successful African American and you keep making them mad."

"Mom... " I trialed off, Kehlani climbed to the top of my bed next to me I laid my head on her shoulder. "I'm so tired, I just wanna forget but my mind won't let me." I admitted, my phone vibrated and my mom got up grabbing my phone from the night stand giving it to me.