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Austin

Caity's favorite Of Mice And Men songs were Feels Like Forever and Never Giving Up On You. She once said that Never Giving Up On You made her think of us, and ever since she did I couldn't see it in another way too. And so every time I was on stage, singing one of those songs, I thought of her.

The show in London had went okay; I had been in pain, and I had been cramping up afterwards and yes, the head aches were there, but they hadn't been worse than they normally were.

Since the show and meet and greet in London were our biggest in the UK, we had done a small acoustic set at the meet and greet and added two more songs to our setlist in the show. I loved doing something acoustic, since our fans were digging it and the atmosphere during those moments was amazing. Feels Like Forever always was one of those songs we'd play when doing an acoustic set, and I didn't think I could ever forget the happy gloss on her face or the love pouring out of her gaze at me while her eyes never failed to look at me while I sang.

But London and that great feeling were days ago, and my cough had become worse. I was out of breath, more and more every day and it was tiring my out. Today we would play Manchester, and after that Cardiff before heading back to the mainland of Europe and finish tour the week after. And propose to Caity.

'Austin, we have sound check in five!,' Aaron hollered from the front of the bus. I closed my eyes for a second and put my phone down.

'Coming!,' I yelled back. Hailey was asleep next to me, and wasn't about to wake up anytime soon. I stroke her hair and kissed the top of her head before I got out of my bunk and sauntered into the front lounge. 'Babe, Hailey is still asleep in my bed,' I told Caity before bowing down and kissing her.

'Alright, I'll stay here with her.' I nodded and followed Aaron out of bus and into the venue. The crew had already set up most of our things after the other two bands had finished their soundcheck. I waved at the Crown The Empire boys and thanked Peter when he handed me my bodypack. I put my earplugs in and got on stage, helping Justin set up the last few bits before we could start.

'Ready?,' Dean, the sound tech said. We all nodded and Tino ticked his drumsticks together four times before we started playing Public Service Announcement. After singing only a few sentences I felt out of breath again, and I inhaled deeply to be able to go on. It took a lot of effort to finish the song and when I threw out the last lyrics I started coughing again.

'You okay, Aust?,' Alan asked, his eyes looking a bit worried. I scraped my throat and nodded while taking a big swig of water from my bottle.

'Yeah...'

'Austin, can we go on to the next song?,' Dean asked.

'Sure. Go.' I put the bottle away and inhaled another few times before starting off with Like A Ghost, but the same thing happened when we ended that song. It felt like I couldn't stop coughing and as if my lungs were tearing apart, which they might were since I was coughing up blood now.

I stared at my hand in terror while my bandmates looked me up and down.

'Dude, is that -,' Alan started, his eyes going wide at the sight of the red drops on my hand and sleeve.

'Fuck,' I muttered. I mumbled an excuse and pulled my earplugs out while I ran off the stage and into the backstage restroom. I coughed again, more blood coming out of my mouth and spilling in the sink, the red of it contrasting with the white. I was getting anxious now, since my lungs and throat felt irritated and I couldn't stop coughing, unable to get a proper breath and get some rest.

'Austin?!,' Tino's voice sounded from the door. He stared at me, horrified at the scene in front of him. 'Shit, dude...' I took a raspy breath and tried to find some comfort, letting the water run into the sink to rinse away the blood. 'Wait here,' Tino ordered me and he ran off. I cupped my hands under the waterstream and threw some water in my face, washing away the blood on my lips and hands.

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