Sobriety Is Super Overrated

Tears From Heaven

Seeing Dave was like falling in love with him all over again.

He immediately wrapped his arms around me, then he pulled back.

"I'm so sorry."

"You have no reason to be sorry." I was still overwhelmed by joy at seeing him, I didn't have time to process what he was saying. What reason could Dave possibly have to be sorry for?

"I do, though." He looked down while he said it. I struggled against the thick rope, currently holding me against the chair. Ben noticed and started untying me. When he finished, he left the room, presumably to give us some privacy.

I stand up, only to start falling, my legs are asleep from having been tied up that long. Dave catches my fall with ease, he's arms still feel as muscular as they did back in Vietnam.

"I'm sorry Klaus."

"Don't say that. You have no reason to be sorry." I caress his cheek gently with the palm of my hand. My sweet Dave, what did he ever do to deserve death?

"I couldn't help it, I was ashamed." My eyebrows furrow in confusion.

"What are you talking about." I get up out of his arms and stand on my own.

He runs a hand through his hair. "You're going to be so mad. Promise you won't be mad?"

"Even if I do get mad, I promise to never stay mad." I could never stay mad at Dave, and I'm so happy that's he's back I don't think anything could bring my mood down.

Dave takes in a deep breath. "I knew you were trying to conjure me, and I was trying to block you from doing it, from summoning me here, that is."

What?

That's the only word that comes into my mind after he says that. I'm barely able to process what he's saying, all I can think about is him not loving me anymore. It suddenly feels as though my whole world is falling apart. He could have told me earlier he didn't like me, maybe even broken up with me while he was still alive? That was the only possible explanation. Dave didn't like me that way. I feel sad about it, more than sad actually, I feel like my heart has been torn in two, but I try to keep my emotions inside, if he knew he would just feel worse for what he did. And even though he was purposefully avoiding me.....I still want him to be happy.

"I swear, there's an explanation. There's a reason I had to do it. Or I thought I had to do at the time. I know it was stupid, I know I shouldn't have hurt you like that but-" His voice cracked. He looked like he was about to cry. I knew that feeling. The feeling of trying to keep everything bubbled up. Pretty soon that bubble was going to burst.

"I thought he hated me. I thought he would hate me and that I had to beg for forgiveness, I knew going back to you would make it worse, in my mind then, it would be like going back to sin."

Dave looked as though he was falling apart. I pulled him into a hug before the pieces of his mind shattered completely. I could feel wet tears start to make their way onto my shoulder, but I didn't pull back, I just let him keep crying. He needed this.

When Dave's sobs died down to nothing but momentary sniffles, he decided he was ready to talk again. Dave pulled off me and wiped the last of his tears off his face.

"I thought it was a sin, I thought that if I were to go and see you again, he would send me to hell. Little did I know that 'he' is actually a she, and she couldn't care less whether I go see you or not."

"I'm still confused."

"I met God, Klaus."

I'd never really believed in god, it always just seemed too good and too hopeful to be true, but Dave had always been a strong believer in god, with him being Jewish and all. Of course he already knows I don't believe, but that doesn't matter in our relationship anyway.

I suddenly understood what had happened to him while we were apart. When we were in Vietnam, I remember times when he would say little homophobic sounding things, I remember when he would say......

"Fags burn in hell, Klaus."

"It just isn't natural."

"It's just a phase, I'll grow out of it."

"I can cure this."

He really felt that if you were gay, you were going to hell. That he was damned forever if he didn't cure himself. There were times when he would avoid me for days, just because he thought that would help cure him, and then there were days when he would spend time with me and tell me how much he loved me. I always told him that god loved everyone, no matter what. It turns out that he didn't believe me.

"You were right."

"I know."

"Being gay isn't a sin."

"I know."

"God told me some things about you too."

"What did god say?"

I was suddenly confused all over again.

"God told me about your powers to contact the dead, and about how you time traveled to Vietnam. Why didn't you tell me?"

"You would have thought I was crazy. You would have never believed me."

"I suppose that's true." He shrugged, I guess that was a good enough answer for him, it was also the truth.

"I've missed you so much." I'm so happy I could cry.

"I missed you too."

I come closer to him again, wrapping my arms around his waist and laying my head down on his chest.

I know you're probably thinking, 'why does Klaus get a handsome tall blonde boyfriend and not me?', well, for your information, I've has endured an endless amount of trauma, so fuck all you fangirls because I deserve this.

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I know I broke the fourth wall, but you know what? Imma repair it in the next chapter.