Spider-Man and The Lightning Girl | Marvel

Chapter 7

Peter

It can't be described, the pain you feel when someone you love sadly cannot escape the inevitable jaws of death. You long for them to be alive, even long for your own death. Anything to make the pain stop. Why couldn't I just die? It wasn't fair. Surely this was punishment, cause life right now didn't have any rewards. I've never liked the thoughts of death, even before my parents died. Being alone scared me, no one to love me and no one for me to love. And now, my worst fears were coming true. I just wanted the pain to stop. Alex told me it subsides over time, but I don't think it ever will. Not when it hurts this much. But killing myself was out of the question. Alex and Mr. Stark wouldn't allow it. I was constantly underwatch. I only ever ate to make them happy. It wasn't very good for my metabolism. But I could care less about that. I just wasn't hungry or tired anymore. I stayed up for hours on end, until Mr. Stark made me go to bed. I knew that way I was acting wasn't okay. I just couldn't compel myself to do anything but mope around all week. My bedroom quickly became disgusting. No matter how much Mr. Stark begged for me to clean it. I just wasn't feeling it. Just like I wasn't feeling a lot of things right now. Spider-Man had become a distant past.

¨Peter?¨ I hear Mr. Stark knock on the door. I sigh and get out of bed to let him in. ¨Peter, I-¨

¨If you're going to tell me to clean my room you're wasting your breath.¨ I flop back onto my bed,

¨No, I wasn't going to say that. Peter, I know that you're upset over May, and I can respect that. But you can't stop living because someone you love dies.¨

¨I wish I could... ¨ Anything to make the pain stop. Anything.

¨What about Alex , Peter? This isn't fair to her. Isn't she still worth living for?¨

¨I...¨ He was right. I was being a jerk. She didn't deserve this. I had ignored her for to long. I really did miss her. At first I was too upset to talk to her. And then I felt guilty, but after that it would've been awkward after we hadn't talked for so long. So now I just avoided her, which was hard. Cause I still loved her, I just never knew if she still loved me. Well, I guess it's now or never.

¨Okay, I'll talk to her.¨ I sighed, it was time to stop acting like a kid.

¨Good.¨ He turned to leave.

¨And Peter? I know for a fact she misses you.¨ And with that he left. And suddenly I got an urge of excitement, that was quickly replaced with fear. What if Alex doesn't want to talk? Would she even understand? Did she miss me as much I've missed her? Or would she be angry with me? Whatever the case, I was soon going to find out, because this time, I wasn't backing out.