Imagine #15

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by justasimplefangurl

by justasimplefangurl

{Mark Sloan~ Save myself}

I gave all my oxygen to people that could breathe
I gave away my money and now we don't even speak
I drove miles and miles, but would you do the same for me?

You watched as New York became nothing more than a blur. You should have left when Derek did but you kept hoping, hell you were praying, that it was just one incident and that things would work themselves out and that Mark loved you. The pain you feel is no longer one of hurt but whether, one of disappointment.

Oh, honestly?
Offered off my shoulder just for you to cry upon
Gave you constant shelter and a bed to keep you warm
They gave me the heartache and in return I gave a song
It goes on and on

You saved Mark Sloan! He couldn't be half the man he became had you not pushed him to be better than everyone expected to become.

Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels
I drown it with a drink and out-of-date prescription pills

Alcohol... Solves everything.

Drugs... the numb.

The two together- provide an escape.

And all the ones that love me they just left me on the shelf
No farewell
So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself

You look at yourself and see the reflection of the person he made you! He pushed you too far and you were so tired. But you loved him.

I gave you all my energy and I took away your pain
'Cause human beings are destined to radiate or dream
What line do we stand upon 'cause from here looks the same?
And only scars remain

You healed him. Is this your thanks?

Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels
I drown it with a drink and out-of-date prescription pills
And all the ones that love me they just left me on the shelf
No farewell
So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself
But if don't
Then I'll go back
To where I'm rescuing a stranger
Just because they needed saving just like that

You didn't even know Mark! You just didn't want him to have to fend for his self. You rescued a stranger that became the love of your life and for what. An affair?

Oh, I'm here again
Between the devil and the danger
But I guess it's just my nature
My dad was wrong
'Cause I'm not like my mum
'Cause she'd just smile and I'm complaining in a song
But it helps

You devoted yourself to him because you fell in love, he became your life. Your heart and soul because he made you feel alive! Like you could breath again. Because of him you felt alive...

So before I save someone else
I've got to save myself
Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels
I drown it with a drink and out-of-date prescription pills
And all the ones that love me they just left me on the shelf
No farewell

Cheating seems so easy to others but you don't understand the satisfaction. How can you betray someone you love? Did he not love you back?

So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself
And before I blame someone else, I've got to save myself
And before I love someone else, I've got to love myself

You are leaving Mark Sloan... Not for him but for you. You place the engagement ring he bought for you on the table inside your apartment. You grab the bag you had packed only taking what you believe to be an essential. Settle- Derek's destination and now yours all because of what was thought to have been a single night.

One unlucky night out of the multiple that had taken place.

Derek stood waiting for you at the airport where he smiled a weak smile.

"Are you sure this is what you want (Y/n)?"

"Derek, I have to do this, I have to say myself!" He nods in understanding and grabs your bag.

Good bye New York. Good bye Mark Sloan.