That February Day // Reader x BMC x DEH One Shots (FINISHED)

Evan Hansen x Reader

~Title: Dead Kids Sister~
PART 2
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Readers POV
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Anger wasn't even the right word to describe how I felt. I flipped through the pages of my history book, trying desperately to distract myself but it didn't work. For the first time in a long time I broke down. Even the strongest people break and I Y/N had broken. Hot tears streamed down my cheeks. Fuck Evan Hansen. Fuck him for making me feel like shit! I picked up my history text book and threw it across my room, watching it hit the door with a loud thud. I then heard heavy footsteps coming up the stairs. I quickly wiped my tears. My mother opened the door

"Are you alright?" She frowned. Walking in. I noticed that her hands were twitching violently. I nodded quickly "always." I forced a smile. One of us had to hold this family together and I knew it would have to be me. My dad pretended he was ok but I knew like me he cried when he was alone and my mother Well- the poor woman was lost.

~A Few Weeks Later~

Jared, Alana, and Evan had proposed an idea. I had finally spoken to Evan again but only when he came over. They were going to start something called the Connor project. A student group dedicated to keeping Connors memory alive. There was to be an assembly at school. I refused to go that day. I guess you could say I was scared. It had taken me awhile but I finally missed my brother. Everything that had happened had hit me at once. I felt drained. I felt like a broken record. I knew if I went I'd cry the whole time. I remember when we would go outside and I'd want to go on the swing but I was to short to get on. He'd help me and push me. When I needed help with my grade 9 English essay he helped me.

Instead I watched everything unfold online. The speeches my parents made and some of the other students. But only one caught my eye. Evans. The fear in his voice. The pure look of terror in his eyes. Out of all of us he seemed the most upset. I watched him drop his cards. He was clearly trying to hold it together. I applauded him for that. What came next broke me. The tales he told of my brother. Their friendship,
Something I could only dream of now with my brother. I wish we could've fixed things then maybe I wouldn't be left feeling like this, maybe he wouldn't be dead.

I quickly slammed my laptop shut. I had heard and seen enough for one day. I couldn't bare anymore. I hadn't even realized I was crying until I heard a loud sob escape from my mouth, I pulled my knees up to my chest and stayed like that till my parents came home. I was an only child now, and I always would be.

"Y/N!" I heard my name called multiple times but never dared to leave my room. Thoughts raced through my head 'it could be my fault he's dead' and 'why didn't you fix things well you could?' They stopped calling for me. After a few minutes there was a knock at my door. Evan walked in, a frown on his face. I didn't like when people saw me like this. I looked weak.

I wasn't weak. Was I?

"H-Hey..." I sniffled "I really liked your speech..." I watched him fidget with something in his pocket. He smiled weakly "thanks..." for once I didn't hear a stutter in his voice or anything. He sounded calm. A side of Evan I had never seen or heard. He sat down beside me. "I'm really sorry Y/N, about everything that's happened these last few months. If I had it my way I'd bring him back and I'd fix everything." I nodded, feeling the tears coming again "and I'm sorry about a few weeks ago, I don't know what overcame me, I hope you can forgive me." He lowered his head. I took Evans hand "everyone makes mistakes." He looked back up at me. Wiping the tears from my eyes. I let out a giggle. "Connor made a mistake when he took his own life." Evan nodded "like Connor said I wish we had just talked... I'm not as mean as everyone thinks I am." I watched Evan smile. This time instead of him going in for the kiss, I did. I pushed my lips gently against his.

Poor Evan was totally shocked. He let out a loud squeak. I pulled away, I couldn't read the expression on Evans face "what? What's wrong? Did I mess up if I did I'm sorry" I frowned. He shook his head and smiled "wow." Evan pulled me onto his lap. I looked away shyly. My cheeks turning bright pink. He kissed the tip of my nose "you didn't mess up." He smiled awkwardly. Eventually though we went back to kissing each other on the lips. It was funny, this felt like my safe space. It was just me and Evan and I liked that.

And it was funny. I imagined Evan would be a terrible kisser but once he got the hang of things he was actually quite good.
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Evans POV
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Oh what had I done..? I couldn't stop lying now. Not when I had the girl of my dreams and I was finally bringing this family together. I'd lie for as long as I had to. Maybe even take this secret to my grave. I finally felt like I was included like I wasn't just a burden. I mattered. Y/N wasn't the one who had messed up though. In a sense I had. But I was fixing everyone's lives and giving them hope, right?

(I'm thinking about making a part 3 please tell me if you'd be interested in that!)