Remember the times

Chapter 12

"Caught in a lie
Pull me from this hell
I can’t be free from this pain
Save me, I am being punished"
-Lie

Jungkook checked the inner pocket of his suit again.It was there,It was still there.He took his seat in the front row between Hoseok and Taehyung.He was noticing things,Something was going on,Jin and Namjoon were trying to hide something.They are gaurding Yoongi from everyone.Someone was speaking over the microphone but he couldn't quite register what he was saying.His mind was all over the place.His eyes travelled to Taehyung who was intensely listening to Jihyun though he tapped his foot once in a while.Jungkook shifted in his seat and turned his gaze to Hoseok.Hoseok was texting someone.He couldn't see who but there were no replies ,Just long long messages from Hoseok's side.

"To whom are you texting,Hyung?",Jungkook asked.He saw Hoseok panicking immediately as he turned off his phone and snuck it into his pocket.
"Noone",he breathed.Jungkook's eyes still scanned Hoseok as realization hit him.
"You are texting Jiminie Hyung!"
"No,am not",Hoseok said turning away from Jungkook and focusing ahead instead.

"Every life’s a movie
We got different stars and stories
We got different nights and mornings
Our scenarios ain’t just boring"
-Reflection

Namjoon kept fumbling on his blazer.
"Are you okay?",Jin asked from across Yoongi,"what's wrong?"
Namjoon stayed quiet,refusing to meet Jin's eyes.Jin said,as if he was reading Namjoon's mind,"You don't have to do this if it bothers you so much"
Namjoon sighed as he chose to acknowledge Jin.
"'am the leader,I don't have a choice"
"That's what you think",Yoongi drawled.Namjoon and Jin stared at Yoongi as if he spoke an alien language.
Yoongi straightened up,"You do have a choice.You always did.The thing was even when you had choices,better choices,You didn't settle to the easy way out.Eventhough am older than you,You made me feel like I could look upto you too",Yoongi straightened up a bit and smiled,which was outright weird.It looked close to insanity but his eyes were soft,It had all  the love in the world for his brother.
"Thanks Namjoon for not walking out on us even when you had the chance"

Even Before Namjoon could process any of Yoongi's words properly,Someone tapped on his shoulders urging him to take the podium.He crumbled up the speech he  had written last night as he went.He cleared up his throat and took in the crowd.His five brothers sitting upfront.He had a sudden urge to run back to them and hug them tightly.Instead he smiled lightly before he started.

"Saying Goodbyes when you are not ready is really the hardest thing.But I guess we will never be really ready to say goodbye to the people we love.And today I am not ready too,though I have accepted it.People deal with grief in their own ways and heal differently.And the guilty about if am allowed to be happy,I know ...we all have that.My friend is gone,am I allowed to smile again? And I don't know the answer to that.But if I have learned anything in life,it is that we all deserve to be happy,be loved and be healed-"

"We will together get past this pain and live our lives,not just for us,for him too.The days he didn't get to see,let's see for him.The moments he didn't get to feel,let's feel it for him.The roads he didn't get to travel,let's walk it for him..for he is with us,in our hearts and our thoughts.That's something death can't take away from us.Jiminah,Live through me",Namjoon concluded and smiled slightly.For a weird reason,that put smile on most people's face although tears streamed down their faces.

When Namjoon got down,Jimin's mother engulfed him into a hug and Namjoon let himself relax into her hug.The heaviness of his heart was lifting.Jin took the podium next.He looked like he had so much in his mind and he was still debating on what he should say.He fixed the microphone couple of times nervously.