Must Be Love

Again

Roger's P.O.V
The tour had finally ended, it was really fun. I had built up a good relationship with the girls, it was going to be really sad leaving them behind.

We went out for a drink to celebrate the success of the tour, we went to a nearby club that was down the road to our hotel. We had finished up in Las Vegas.

Most of us were coming, Freddie, Brian, John, Paul, Reid, Miami, Pheobe and Me. The bar was loud and cramped, flashing blue and purple lights spun around the room as loud clubbing music played in the background.

I had drunk too much, several shot glasses full of Vodka. I did cocaine as well with Freddie, we were absolutely shitfaced but it was well worth it. I went to the bathroom, Paul was in there. He hadn't drunk anything and was completely sober.

I opened the bathroom door and Paul followed me, he grabbed my chin in his hand and crashed our lips together. I was too smashed to realise who he was, I closed my eyes and kissed him back.

It went too far, he began pulling down my pants and boxers. He flipped me over against the cold metal wall and began touching around my ass and thighs. I realised what he was doing and I began to try and push him off me.

"Stop, stop" I giggled and placed my head on his shoulder. He continued to kiss me and knead my ass, once he pulled away he grinned at me. "You're coming home with me for the night" he said, he grabbed my wrist.

We walked out of the bar back up to Paul's hotel room, he threw me down onto the bed and climbed on top of me. "Paul please get off" I slurred, trying to sit up but Paul shoved me back down.

"Shut up Taylor" he growled "I'm going to make you feel so good" he undid his belt and threw it over to the side of the room.

No. This couldn't be happening. Not again. Not after Violet, not after Kian, not after Lawrence.

He pinned my arms above my head and began the long hours of assault that followed.

"P-Paul" I whimpered after he had came "Please.. n-no more" he grinned at me and went back to kiss at my neck, making another hickey over the tattoo I had of Freddie's name. I shuddered and closed my eyes, curling up in a ball.

He yanked my legs open and positioned himself. I was going to scream, he pushed a pillow over my face and I wailed out as he pushed into me. "Those beautiful screams are making me do it even more"

I began crying, even in my drunken state I still felt violated and disgusted. "You look gorgeous my darling" he said, he did it to resemble Freddie. He ruined everything, I just closed my eyes. He lifted the pillow off my face and I tried to imagine Freddie. I moved away from reality.

"Shh" A gentle, familiar voice whispered "You're doing so well Roggie" I opened my eyes and saw Freddie above me. He was slowly moving in and out of me, I placed my hands on his shoulders and smiled against his skin.

"Are you real?" I asked, touching his face. He nuzzled into it and nodded, I began to quietly sob as he gently moved a little faster. "Do you want me to stop?" He asked sweetly. I nodded and then it faded to reality.

I stumbled back to my room. My eyelids drooping and my back hurting from the amount of times Paul had rammed into me. I felt dirty, I got into my room, Freddie was already there. He was naked and asleep, usually I would have enjoyed him being in the nude with me but I didn't want to sleep next to him.

I covered up every inch of my skin, with multiple layers of clothing. I was sweating profusely but I didn't care, I crawled into the bathtub and fell asleep. Hot tears rolling down my cheeks, quiet strangled sobs escaping my lips.

I woke up the next morning, Freddie was shaking me awake. I scrambled away from him in a panic, he looked surprised and hurt. "Are you alright darling?" He asked. There it was, the word that he had said last night darling.

I nodded and quickly got away from him back to the hotel room. Lola was lying on the bed, waiting for everything to get back to normal and we would settle down and have a cuddle.

I flopped down onto the bed, Freddie came and lay down next to me. He placed his hand on my shoulder, I shoved it off me and curled up into a ball. We were leaving very soon, Freddie sighed and got up to go have a shower.

We got onto the plane a few hours after I had woken up. He was on the plane as well, I got up to go to the toilet when he got in with me. I shrunk against the wall, cowering in fear. He grinned at me again, I didn't want him anywhere near me.

"Morning beautiful" he said "Look how obident you can be" he gripped my jaw in his hand and I whimpered again. He just laughed cruelly in my face.

"The man who makes women drop their panties with one glance is scared of me" he laughed "You enjoyed last night" I shook my head, my body trembling violently.

"Ah right" he said "Listen if you tell anyone, I'll do it again" he looked at me "I probably will do it again anyway" he smirked at me "You're a very special little whore" I shook my head, tears beginning to form in my eyes.

"Do you understand me?" He asked. I nodded and to my relief he left the toilet. I shakily stood up and threw up in the toilet, gripping the side of the seat so hard my knuckles turned white. I spat out the remaining sick before I flushed everything away.

I wiped my mouth and took a deep breath in, taking a tin of mints out of my pocket to drown out the taste of vomit that lingered on my tongue.

I needed someone I could trust, it didn't feel right talking to Freddie. I needed the one person who I knew wouldn't judge me.

I needed Kian.