Silenced by the Night

I'll be here

Caroline went in my room holding a book. This I gotta see.

“What do you want?”

“Nothing, I just called Nathan to come over and maybe we can talk. I broke the deal alright”

“I’m not a fool to be fooled alright”

“Ellie, I’m not lying; he’s free to come in this house anytime even when I’m around”

“OK, I trust you”

She gave me a smile and left the room and being replaced by Nathan. He was wearing the black leather jacket he wore the first time I saw him. The purple shirt worn underneath it, and he wore black jeans and red Nikes. The smile still glued on his face.

“Hey Nate”

“Hello Ellie”

He sat down on my bed and twisted some strands of my hair on his fingers. This wasn’t what he usually does. My hands were locked in his; it was awkward how he would do that. There was a thought inside my head saying ‘don’t destroy the moment’. What does that mean? We still hadn’t talked but last night; well he just explained and I listened.

“So how are you?”

“Missing you”

I felt right while saying the two words. My feeling became lighter. His arms wrapped around my shoulder while we were both staring at my father’s drawing. The drawing of the whole family, my mother standing there holding my hand, my father’s hand on my shoulder; it was the moment I’ve missed. My curls were divided into two and I was wearing a blue dress with my black ballet flats. Hanna’s hair was perfectly combed; her teal dress was perfectly ironed. Her black shoes neatly wiped.

“You miss them do you?”

The tear rolled down my face and into his hand that was holding mine. We were acting different today. I felt mature and in the age of a teenager. He just sat there quietly looking at the drawing. My dad never wanted a picture being taken, he wanted it drawn. He was a magnificent father. Though my head keeps saying that he wasn’t dead; he was somewhere out there.

“I really do, I wish my parents was still here”

“Believe me they are here; they’re not around but always in your heart. Now go to sleep”

My eyes fluttered open and in the direction where the single bed was placed. Nathan wasn’t there anymore; he must’ve gotten up earlier than me.

“Good Morning”

He greeted while scanning my drawer filled with my father’s things.

“Nate, don’t touch that, now go take a shower and I’ll follow you later”

People might continue gossiping about me and Nathan. They’ll be thinking about the both of us dating again. But I was worried about Caylah, how if she told Caroline about us being so close behind her back. My stomach was aching; I felt like I was gonna throw up. I ran to the bathroom and rushed to the toilet. Nathan was standing in front of the mirror combing his hair.

“Ellie, are you alright?”

I wiped the side of my mouth with a tissue and sat down on the toilet.

“Yeah I’m fine; just wait for me in my room”

“Or downstairs; Paige disturbed me and told me we were having breakfast with all of them”

“You don’t say”

I was again throwing up; there was something going on. Nathan was waiting in the doorway reading a newspaper. My skin was already so pale from all that throwing up I did.

“Are we ready to go?”

“Just one moment”

Throwing up, AGAIN; it was a bit disturbing.

“You know this throwing up so much isn’t normal; I think you should check a doctor”

He grabbed my hand and pulled me downstairs. We walked the one last block we needed to take so we can make it to their house.

“Mom, can you take us to the hospital. There’s really something wrong with her”

This wasn’t supposed to happen. I don’t have anything wrong with me; just because I’m throwing up so much doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with me. But Nathan was right, it wasn’t normal neither even healthy. His mother came out the house and went into the car. I was on the backseat while he was in the passenger’s seat. He reached out for my hand and held it tightly. Lately, Nathan has been acting weird.

“I do not have bulimia”

Nathan crashed my bag on the couch and sat me down on the couch.

“Don’t worry, it’s not gonna kill you”

He stood up before I ran into the bathroom and started throwing up.

“I told you, you do have bulimia”

I threw a piece of tissue at him and saw blood on the toilet.

“And I think you’re throwing up really hard. OK, I promise I’ll be here till you get better”

Nathan was the greatest. But somehow he found a way to get in my mind. My bulimia might change everything; even our friendship. I have an eating disorder. I do chores around the house; I can’t go to the bathroom everytime just to throw up.

“Maybe you need to stay in the hospital just to get better. Yeah, you speak your thoughts too loud”

“Thanks Nate”

“Can someone hand me that bucket?”

Jessica, his little sister; handed him the bucket from the side and gave it to me.

“Don’t worry I know your habit”

The nurse entered the room disturbing mine and Nathan’s conversation.

“Visiting hours is over”

He stroked my hair lightly before whispering something in my ear and handing me a piece of paper with a short note written on it. Nathan and Jessica, well their whole family was the only one visiting. His family was really close to me; they were like my family. Hanna went in the room with her friend she was already living with.

“I know visiting hours is over but I told the nurse it’s important. So how are you Ellie?”

“I have bulimia, and I’m in the hospital”

“We better get going, the nurse said only in a little time. I’ll see you tomorrow; Hi Nathan”

Nathan went back inside; his hands in his pocket and his hood thrown over his head.

“Hi Nate, I thought visiting hours were over”

“Nothing’s over with me”

This was the typical him; he wouldn’t give up on anything. Even if we were only friends for two months we were so different from the others.

Was this friendship really this strong?