Space Enough To Grow (Austin Carlile)

I'm Sorry

"What the hell are doing in my room?" i say, still taken aback on how Austin got in here in the first place.He is seated on my bed, going through something on his phone, and a frown on his face while doing so. Why did he even come here anyway? he probably thinks i want an apoligy or something.

"Oh," he looks up from his phone, and gets off the bed, making his way over to me. Its like he planned this.

"Can I apologize?" He speaks again, his voice confident. I take a step back, as he steps closer to me.

"Apologize? For being an asshole? Isn't it a little late?" I say and smirk, making my way forward toward Austin, a smug look on his face.

"I came here to apologise for last night, i was drunk and i didn't know a word i was saying." He spat, making my heart hurt a little.

"Oh." Is all I say, looking down at my sock covered feet, and shake my head.

"what? Is something wrong?" He says, with an actually kinda worried face. I look at him, frowning with a bit of a pout. My eyes then trail up to his deep brown eyes, and his eyes flutter, like they were trying to make me drop head over heels for him.

I quickly snap out of my now awkward trance, by the sound of Austin clearing his throat. then Its silent, an uneasy silence.

"I'm fine." I give him a glare, trying to hide my feelings. All I can do is think back to when he 'liked a side of me'. It actually made me feel good a little, but i actually do think Austin meant it. By the way he spoke it with carefull words and fond eyes, it was perfect. Maybe too perfect.

I think that if this kept going on, that we could possibly be friends, just friends. Or... no. nope nope nope. Anyway, I actually think i feel good for once. Austin could be lying, and thatbhe did actually mean those words. I look at Austin, giving him a fond smile, and he actually smiles back.

The his phone starts to ring loudly, and he pulls it out of his pocket, and i watch as he answers it, putting it to his ear. I watch as his smile fades, into a mad look.

"Um.. Ashley i'll call you back.. I'll be home soon... bye." He says, ending the call, and looks at me giving me a hopeful look.

Then it hit me, Austin probably didn't mean it, he was drunk and so was I. And he's probably fucking that bitch. I knew him too well.

And right then and there, a little bit of me died inside. I looked away at the wall, saddness stabbing me like a knife. I breathed in and out.. in and out. I whispered quietly.

"Get out." is all i could manage to get out. This is it, this is when i ruin everything. I couldn't look at him, in no way possible, or i might break down in sobs.

"What?" His voice tiny, like a sqeak. It made me feel horrible about what i was going to do next.

"I said, get out!' I almost yelled, but trying to be quiet, incase if Alan comes upstairs.

"Danielle?" He says confused, and I glance at him, his faced unbearable to look at. I try to hold my tears back, but one streams down my cheek, hitting the floor quietly.

"Please, just leave. now." I point to the door, and wipe my cheeks, feeling the tears rolling down them. I shouldn't be crying over this.

He dosen't say a word, and paces to my door. "I don't know what i did wrong, but i'm fucking sorry." He said, walking out and slamming the door.

i look at the door, and silently cry. I messed up.