lie //yoonmin

41 // yoongi

"Yoongi look. Wake up. Look. You need to see this."

I groan and stretch my arms feeling strangely achey.

"Yooooongi," Jimin screams in my ear.

"What do you want kid," I say groggily, rubbing the sleep from my eyes and blinking them open.

I realize I'm still on the couch but surrounded by blankets and pillows. Last night's events come rushing back leaving me feeling like shit.

Jimin sees my expression and explains.

"You fell asleep on my lap but I couldn't carry you so I just brought blankets and pillows for us."

For us. He slept here with me.

"I don't deserve you," I shake my head.

If I were him I would have said 'fuck you' and been out the door at least 10 times in just the past 24 hours.

"Ugh stop saying that," Jimin rolls his eyes. "Look at this."

He puts his phone in my face with the Twitter trends open.

"Jimin I don't wanna-

"Just look," he smiles.

I glance at it to see all the hateful hashtags from yesterday replaced with loving ones.

I take the phone carefully and press on #WeLoveYouSuga. My fans are really out there telling me to stay strong and keep going.

I smile. "I don't deserve them either."

"You deserve the entire world and more," Jimin says, kissing my cheek. "You're too hard on yourself."

I don't respond to that. Maybe I have been a little too hard lately. If Jimin has forgiven me for the shitty things I've done, then shouldn't I ?

Jimin climbs onto my lap and leans his forehead against mine. My arms automatically go around his waist, pulling him closer until we're chest to chest. 

"Keep going," he whispers.

"With what?" I ask, confused.

"Your book. Don't give up now," he says.

"I-I'm not sure," I reply.

I don't know the first thing about self publishing. I was lucky enough to get picked up by SKZ as soon as I graduated college. I never had to deal with money or marketing or scheduling. I just wrote and they took care of the rest.

"But I was looking forward to reading it. I always would look forward to your books," Jimin pouts.

"It's gonna be a lot of work Jiminie," I sigh, leaning my head on his shoulder and talking against his neck. "I would have to do everything by myself. Things I don't even know how to do."

"I'll help with whatever you need," Jimin says without hesitation. "We'll figure it out."

I peer up at him. His full cheeks dusted with a light shade of pink. Long dark lashes framing his kind eyes. The blonde messy hair tumbling onto his forehead. I don't blame myself for what I say next.

My mind is screaming not to say it. It's too early. Much too early. And our relationship is still very unstable. At least on my part. Jimin will probably say no. But I need him to be here. With me.

"Move in with me?"

Jimin wasn't the least bit phased. "Sure."

"Sure?" I ask. "You're serious?"

I was confident he would say no.

He giggles. "If I get to spend more time with you then I'm all for it. Also we'll get to sleep together every night."

"Sleep together, you say?" I raise an eyebrow teasingly.

"Not like that!" He turns a deep red.

"I know baby," I laugh and peck his forehead.

It's cute how he still gets so flustered at the topic of sex. He's been through a lot though, so I'm not pressuring him in any way. If I'm honest- I don't even care if I have to give it up for him. Jimin is worth it.

I still feel so bad about what happened last night. I wanted to feel stronger after feeling weak for so long and I tried to do that by making Jimin feel small. I swear I'm never going to drink again after that. I can't imagine how uncomfortable I must have made him.

"D-do you want to?" Jimin asks suddenly while I'm deep in thought.

"Do I want to what?" I ask, preoccupied with mentally scolding myself.

"You know. Do it," he asks nervously.

I give him my full attention now. "Jimin, I was just joking. You don't need to feel pressured. Last night I-"

"It has nothing to do with last night. I mean- w-well- it felt good. And I kinda wanna- you know what, never mind," he stutters, blushing brightly.

"Baby you don't need to be shy. Talk to me," I encourage.

"I want to try. I don't know how I'll react in that moment but I still wanna try. But if you don't want to forget I said anything," He says, still not meeting my eyes.

Why the fuck would I not want to have sex with my beautiful boyfriend. I really wonder what goes through his mind sometimes.

"Of course I do. I'm so so in love with you and I want to have that kind of intimacy with you. But if you're not ready-"

"I am," he cuts me off. "I- I mean, I think I'm ready."

I think my heart just leaped into my throat because I'm having trouble breathing. 

"A-are you sure?" I ask, feeling suddenly nervous.

He nods with a big smile.

"Ok sweetheart," I grin too. "But I want everything to be perfect so let's wait until tonight?"

He nods again, refusing to meet my eyes. I remember he used to do that so often when we first met.

I grab his chin and force him to look at me.

"Yoongi," he squeals in embarrassment.

"I love you," I say before kissing him deeply.

He leans into me with a soft sound of content.

~V

Next chapter is gonna be really long plus possible smut at the end depending on what happens :)

Ok- so- Boy with Love- uhm... I have no words.

I'd just woken up and my sister casually walked into my room like "Yeah the teaser is out and Halsey is in it."

I literally fell out of bed and ran to my phone. Oh My God I can't waittt. Halsey is literally the person who made me realize I'm gay she's so gorgeous and talented and her with my gorgeous and talented kings is too much. I'm making bets they're going to perform together at the bbmas :)))

UPDATESS- I'm gonna be posting the vHope book soon so look forward to it :)